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In a recent annotation I noticed someone comment //the 14 common mistakes made by murderers//
Ever curious, I checked Google to see if such a list is available. To my surprise I found no such list, per se.
Accordingly, I propose a QA system for murderers, to ensure the job is done cleanly and
efficiently, whilst minimising the chances of detection and/or subsequent apprehension.
Clear guidelines for post-violence avoidance or disposal of witnesses, fingerprints, DNA evidence, chemical residues, weapons and other critical evidence play a large part in the fabric of the document.
Other sections deal with emotional fallout, paranoia and of course, dealing with authorities and their interviews of suspects.
With the massive forces arrayed to ensure their identification and capture it's only logical that murderers should have someone looking out for their interests.
There's a pretty penny to be made in providing such a service, I surmise.
Mistake #1: Googling "How to commit murder"
http://digg.com/odd..._then_Kills_Husband
[DrCurry, Feb 07 2008]
SIG SAUER
http://www.sigsauer.com/Default.aspx
To hell and back reliability. The obvious weapon of choice? [Sometimer, Feb 08 2008]
"largely irrelevant deity"
http://en.wikipedia...i/W._Edwards_Deming
He taught the Japanese how to make good cars, after Detroit told him they didn't need his services. [normzone, Feb 08 2008]
[link]
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I'd buy it, but then I'd have to kill you. (Wouldn't want to leave any suspicious trails, now would we?) |
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Only if I didn't get you first. |
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[UnaBubba], I make my living in QA, and I need to tell you that you're putting the cart before the horse. |
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You need to establish the engineering of the project up front, or you're wasting your time expecting QA to be of any help to you. |
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QA is supposed to be verifying that what was engineered in from the start actually happened. |
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OK, in the real world QA usually gets used to compensate for all the planning that wasn't done, so perhaps this should be viewed as a cleanup service. |
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By the way, did you know that Motorola has trademarked the phrase "six sigma"? |
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Yes, I was aware that Motorola had done that. I'm also aware it has become a phrase likely to be used regardless of their ownership, and the reason I created this play onthe phrase. |
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In my experience QA is regarded by management consultants as the quick solution to sloppy or inconsistent business practices. In reality it doesn't ever prove to be so. |
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QA experts are probably better regarded as self-appointed accolytes of a largely irrelevant deity, if you stop to thnk about it. |
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I've been very satisfied with the "It wasn't me!" alibi.
Rarely have I ever had to resort to the more defensive "You're crazy!" plea. |
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I like this idea not as an aid to criminals, but as a framework for a collection of true crime short stories. The collection would preface with a list of the 14 mistakes and then tell a tale exploring how the commission of one of these mistakes led to the arrest of the criminals. I have a similar book on criminal forensics which was a fun read. |
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I guess you could call it "self-appointed", although the only thing I did was to ask if we could prove that the hull-penetrating electrical connectors that the little startup company was making for underwater manned vehicles were any good. |
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That's how I got into this game twenty-plus years ago. |
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