Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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A Halfbakin' Man

You asked for it, so here it is.
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Some people can't stay away from the screen
They've gotta know if the 'bakery's changed
They refresh every minute or so
In the hope that there'll be somethin' new

Some people live with the fear of the 'bones
Some the anger of having been being a troll
They will not listen to anyone
So nobody gives them a chance

I know I'm only deluding myself
I know I'm pretending to be somebody else
Someone who ain't me
But I guess I'm not here
'Less I'm posting some idea
You could never see yourself willing to wear
I'm not above posting anything
To pull a few croissants if I can
Some people see through the eyes of the old
Before they ever give a thought to the newbs
I'm only willing to read your idea
Because I am a halfbakin' man
I am an halfbakin' man
Oh yes I am

Some people say they will never believe
That light can be faster than dark
Because they only remember too well
They heard someone here tell them it's true

Some people bake all alone every night
Instead of taking a lover to bed
Some people find that it's easier to bake
Than to work anymore

I know you don't want to hear what I say
But I'm gonna annotate your crap idea, anyway
But I've been there and if you can survive
And keep your idea alive
While I'm tearing through it over again
I'm not above being cruel for a while
If you're cool to me I'll understand

Some people come in to look for a fight
Some people arguments they can never win
But they often post pisspoor ideas that are baked
Then accuse that we're out to get them

I am a halfbakin' man
Oh yes I am
A halfbakin' man

You know you only post your crap out of spite
I guess you'd rather be a martyr tonight
That's your decision
And I'm not above
Givin' the odd newbie a shove
If there's a chance of keeping Baker Street clean
I often wish I'd been around at the start
In the days when the 'bakery began

Some people hope for a miracle cure
For an addiction that they can't admit
But I'm too willing to log in again and again
Because I am a halfbakin' man

I am a halfbakin' man
Oh yes I am
A halfbakin' man

UnaBubba, Sep 23 2003

The Collected Works http://www.halfbakery.com/user/UnaBubba
Lots of parody and poetry here. [UnaBubba, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Seven Ages http://www.halfbake...s_20of_20Halfbakers
[UnaBubba, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

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       And I pick up my mandatory early 'bone. You are so predictable.
UnaBubba, Sep 23 2003
  

       Thanks, [UnaBubba]. + Where's my lighter?
k_sra, Sep 23 2003
  

       This is so you.
FarmerJohn, Sep 23 2003
  

       They get a little better each time... one of these days, UB, you'll get the hang of it.
waugsqueke, Sep 23 2003
  

       I can't believe y'all didn't realize I was being sarcastic.
waugsqueke, Sep 23 2003
  

       UnaBubba: Man, what are you doing here?
DrCurry, Sep 23 2003
  

       waugs, we did!
po, Sep 23 2003
  

       Addition is based upon certian model. People who stick around should find what the model of life is and it's possible to change it.
artist, Sep 23 2003
  

       //UnaBubba: Man, what are you doing here?//   

       Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Curry?
UnaBubba, Sep 23 2003
  

       Right artist, but the tune is "Innocent Man", I believe. Not "Piano Man" (co-incidentally, I am currently learning how not piano-man I am).
half, Sep 23 2003
  

       The tune to which this is written is "An Innocent Man". If you want "Piano Man" then read Halfbakery Song.
UnaBubba, Sep 23 2003
  

       Funny, I read it as being based on "New York State of Mind" too. Guess that's why I dropped Music in the Third Form.   

       [It still appalls me that some elements of the music industry refuse to recognize Billy Joel as a "real" musician, causing him a lot of personal grief. Whatever you think of his music, he's sold enough bloody records.]
DrCurry, Sep 23 2003
  

       I'm pretty sure you have become a "real" musician when your music is hacked, and turned into elevator dross... like the "music" they play in the elevators in this building.   

       I just tried playing this in my head, to New York State Of Mind. It works, but not as well a An Innocent Man. Maybe that's why he has so much trouble getting recognition?
UnaBubba, Sep 23 2003
  

       <wide grin>   

       Thanks UB.. you've made my day.
madradish, Sep 24 2003
  

       Hey, hey, not bad. That's the first song for a while UB - did you just need a break after the last album?
goff, Sep 24 2003
  

       Songs are frowned upon. Tut, tut, you know.
UnaBubba, Sep 25 2003
  

       By whom, pray tell?
goff, Sep 25 2003
  

       has anyone done the seven ages of man yet - I've had that on a to do list for far too long. This one seems great, by the way, but it doesn't fit to Brahms so I'll have to visit again later.
badgers, Sep 25 2003
  

       //Whatever you think of his music, he's sold enough bloody records.]//   

       This is true. Nevertheless, I cannot allow the opportunity to state that his music is rubbish to pass.   

       You're talking about Billy Joel, right, not [UnaBubba]?   

       I'd way rather listen to an [UnaBubba] record than a Billy Joel record.
snarfyguy, Sep 26 2003
  

       I know you don't mean that, snarf. Someone as musically enlightened as yourself surely knows and admits there's bad with the good. He has some junk, sure, but he's also got some classics.
waugsqueke, Sep 26 2003
  

       [badgers], I did Seven Ages a while back. [link]
UnaBubba, Sep 26 2003
  


 

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