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Alien ID Card

A means of identifying extraterrestrials
 
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Reports of UFO sightings have increased in frequency and stories of alien encounters and abductions are in the millions. An alien identity card would prove an invaluable tool in illuminating and documenting these contacts. All countries have identity documents: passports, ID cards, driver’s licenses, so like a repairman’s ID or a police officer’s badge, aliens should also be expected to whip out their identity papers upon arrival.

The following data should be included in major world languages:
- name and USO (Universal Organization of Standards) number
- place of residence: planet, star, galaxy or space craft
- date and place of “birth”
- sex if applicable
- profession such as navigator or bioengineer
- physical characteristics such as number of eyes, color and location of teeth
- photograph, signature, “print” from a digit, voice or other individual physical attribute and an alien authority stamp

Of course the card could be integrated with other functions such as: UFO driver’s license (flying saucer, plate, etc.), medical alert information (allergic to mobile phone radiation), instructions for body disposal upon death (to be sent back, can be used for organ transplants).

An electronic signaling, high-orbit satellite could contain the materials to produce such an ID unless the alien already has one, for example a transparent card with buckey ball ink, diamond badge, and full-color, moving, hologram portrait.

FarmerJohn, Sep 21 2002

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       The MIB meet the INS. Hey, wait... maybe the INS *is* a cover for the MIB. That would explain a lot.   

       The next problem: what dating system to use?
RayfordSteele, Sep 21 2002
  

       Just try a singles bar like everyone else.
DrCurry, Sep 21 2002
  

       .¶ ¶. - Brbraa Strsndeia - Vrtdoeae Sngrie
{@ ¤} - Mlbaiu, Clfrnaioia - Crssdoe Yees
{% >} - Brklynoo Nwe Yrko - Fmleae
{} - ߧ ¯¯¯¯¯
thumbwax, Sep 21 2002
  

       Welcome to Earth. Now show me your papers.
BinaryCookies, Sep 22 2002
  

       This is all so complicated. Why not just issue them a Visa card? We'll need to establish some sort of interstellar commerce with them anyway.
ldischler, Oct 17 2002
  

       Issued together with a taxi driver licence.
FarmerJohn, Dec 13 2002
  

       //can be used for organ transplants// It's all about our organs, isn't it? No thank you, we'll wait the three hours at the airport just like everyone else.
sartep, May 19 2004
  

       ATTACK O DAH NERDS!!
EvilPickels, Nov 06 2004
  

       "I am ZOOLNEOR, emissary from Delta Centauri. This is my pilot Groooteen. May we present our... wait a second... our identifi...no Grooot, that's a loyalty card from Starfit...no, not that one either...give it here...oh don't tell me you left them at home! We came four billion parsecs and now I find you forgot our papers! Do I have to do everything for you?"
wagster, Nov 07 2004
  
      
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