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AngelBras

Bras that would accomodate angel's wings
  (+9, -8)
(+9, -8)
  [vote for,
against]

Now, this is a stretch, (and is entirely dependant upon human beings even being able to implant wings on the spinal cord so that they could be moved and used for flying, and such) but I think that bras for angels would be a necessary thing that few people think about when considering such procedures as wing implants.

First of all, the bra would have to be more of a harness, because the wings would get in the way of the strap. Also, you might have to get help in getting the bra on, but hopefully, you'll have friends with whom you're close enough to ask for their help.

HappyKitty, Feb 08 2002

Can angels have sex? http://www.alienres...ce.org/matt2230.htm
No one hmms in heaven, but on earth, angels assume human form, eat and drink, and may be able to hmm. [pottedstu, Feb 11 2002]

(?) Sex in heaven? http://www.lunarpag...gazers/sexinhev.htm
Angels may have come to earth and had their way with human women. So condoms for angels may be more useful. [pottedstu, Feb 11 2002]

(?) Article about bras. http://www.studenta...0-t0-a11544,00.html
This is what I came up with when I asked the question "What are bras for?" [DrBob, Feb 11 2002]

Pope Joan at urbanlegends.com http://www.urbanleg...gion/pope_joan.html
Sources of a false rumour. Joan wasn't actually mentioned in histories till 300 years after her supposed death. [pottedstu, Feb 11 2002]

Pro-Pope Joan argument at UL http://www.urbanleg.../pope_joan_pro.html
She's mentioned by very kosher (in a manner of speaking) 15th C Vatican historian Platina. [pottedstu, Feb 11 2002]

Sex in heaven for Islamic Martyrs? http://www.straight...columns/011214.html
Cecil Adams ponders the rewards Islamic Martyrs offered to martyrs by Islamic teaching. [pottedstu, Feb 11 2002]

Backless/Strapless Sensation Bra http://www.herroom....001-5520&Category=0
[Helium, Feb 11 2002]

Warp Alice http://www.ruthannz...rland/curiouser.htm
into all kinds of shapes [thumbwax, Feb 12 2002]

Knockers or knobs? http://sibboleth.bl...n-hebrew-bible.html
more like y-fronts [bhumphrys, Feb 06 2008]

ping! ping_20go_20the_20s..._20of_20my_20heart!
[po, Feb 06 2008]

[link]






       Spinal cord?? Er, you may go ahead and do that, but the shoulder blades seem like a far likelier solution to me...and before we get started on the bras, let's work on the issue of wings at *all*...
Galileo, Feb 08 2002
  

       Why not a bra that comes with wings?
phoenix, Feb 09 2002
  

       I'm pretty sure that angels go braless.
bristolz, Feb 09 2002
  

       I thought this was going to be a bra with angel wings on the back. Oh well.   

       Don't worry, by the time you engineer the rest of the body for flight, your sternum will have got so large (to attach the flight muscles) that the whole problem becomes somewhat irrelevant.
st3f, Feb 09 2002
  

       Aside from the fact that angels are asexual men, and thus not in great need of bras, I believe there are already bras/cup-holder-thingies designed to be worn with backless dresses, which would I assume suffice, in the unlikely event that you did find an angel with big boobies.
pottedstu, Feb 09 2002
  

       I know a happykitten, and YOU, HappyKitty are NO happykitten.
thumbwax, Feb 09 2002
  

       If you alter physics to the point where a woman with wings can stay aloft, why not simply alter it to the point where this isn't a problem?.
bookworm, Feb 10 2002
  

       And while I'm on the subject cherubim have lion's heads. Angels are all men (Michael, Gabriel...)   

       (But, omigod! Are there now blissmiss1-blissmiss22 plus the original?)
pottedstu, Feb 10 2002
  

       Angels are asexual, pot. BTW I wonder what Pope Joan would have said about it.
po, Feb 10 2002
  

       Angels are asexual?  So, heaven may not be the place it's cracked up to be?
bristolz, Feb 10 2002
  

       There's no sex in heaven. (I'm not sure if this is universal in Christianity, but certainly widespread theology. Lucky I'm an atheist.)
pottedstu, Feb 11 2002
  

       "God created Man in His image"   

       So what is HIS jewels for then? To look cool? Just to piss through?
neelandan, Feb 11 2002
  

       Sex is a punishment for Original Sin (well childbirth is explicitly a punishment, but sex also, my theological sources indicate. I don't know if God would give Adam dangly bits if he would have no use for them.)   

       Anyhow, further research reveals a network of dubious radical Christianity that suggests angels came to earth and boffed people in the distant past, although the "no sex in heaven" rule seems more widesepread.   

       The apocryphal gospel of Thomas, a collection of Jesus's sayings probably from the first century AD. (c. AD 50) includes the following:   

       << Simon Peter said to them, "Make Mary leave us, for females don't deserve life." Jesus said, "Look, I will guide her to make her male, so that she too may become a living spirit resembling you males. For every female who makes herself male will enter the kingdom of Heaven." >>   

       So in conclusion: jockstraps, maybe; bras, nope.
pottedstu, Feb 11 2002
  

       po: Pope Joan (allegedly 855 to 858) never existed; she was a 14th century anti-Catholic fabrication.
pottedstu, Feb 11 2002
  

       [pot] prove it. sex is a punishment? thats a new one. what did I do to deserve chocolate then?
po, Feb 11 2002
  

       "no sex in heaven"... isn't that a contradiction in terms? Well, if hell is where all the fornicators go, I've just worked out whether or not to live a pious life.
sappho, Feb 11 2002
  

       [pot] angels can hummmm. have they forgotten the words?
po, Feb 11 2002
  

       No comment
thumbwax, Feb 11 2002
  

       //angels can hummmm//

...then they should take a bath more often.

I was going to post a question along the lines of 'why would an angel need a bra anyway', but then I thought, 'why does anyone need a bra?'. So then I googled for the answer and came up with the link above.
DrBob, Feb 11 2002
  

       Pope Joan links supplied. There's little evidence, but lots of folklore.   

       As to sex being a punishment, I can believe love is a punishment, but surely not sex. Still, the church is pretty anti-sex, especially the celibate branches thereof, so who knows what they think.   

       Sorry about "hmm"; I was experimenting with obscure sexual euphemisms. "hmm"="you know what".
pottedstu, Feb 11 2002
  

       //the church is pretty anti-sex//   

       I don't think the church are anti-sex, more the misuse of it. After all God created sex.
Helium, Feb 11 2002
  

       Agreed, Helium.
waugsqueke, Feb 11 2002
  

       If I may explain my intention, (to get us off these knotty theological problems, of which NONE OF US!!!!!!!! are qualified to answer) which was for bras designed for humans who have had cosmetic surgery to add synthetic wings to their spinal column. THese wings may not even be able to fly, in the first generation, but no matter; the emphasis is on the bras, not the wings.   

       And as for the angels being male, the order of the Virtues were personified as females. If we are taking all angels into account, that is. If not, then, well...
HappyKitty, Feb 11 2002
  

       // I don't think the church are anti-sex, more the misuse of it. //   

       But then you're just left with defining what constitutes misuse (I think we're all opposed to the misuse of pretty much everything), and unless we all want a trip to Troll-Baiter's anonymous, I suggest we follow HappyKitty and return to underwear design (if thinking about breasts is not sinful).
pottedstu, Feb 11 2002
  

       I disagree, I do not think we should indulge HappyKitty's obvious fetish for female clothing and I think we should continue to discuss the misuse of sex. Did I say that?
po, Feb 11 2002
  

       OK, since you ask, those men seeking sex in heaven should try Islam. The Hadith (sayings of Mohammed) number 2,562 says the just/righteous get at least 72 wives in Heaven; possibly less of an incentive for women. I also found some weird purportedly Mormon website that said in Heaven every man got 45 wives, but I think it was very very nutty. So I guess you pays your money and you takes your choice. (Not sure how women are supposed to choose.)   

       And, po, would you rather Kitty was putting bras on flying women, or having them flap about ungathered? Think of the plane crashes *that* would cause. (Sorry, I've now offended women, pilots, Moslems and Christians today.)
pottedstu, Feb 11 2002
  

       I think one of those halter neck bras made for backless, halter neck dresses would be more than adequate. No need to thread your wings through.   

       Or how about strapless and backless magicups, or the backless/strapless sensation bra. See Link.   

       I think you'll find there's a bra for every conceivable occasion. Trust me, I've seen more than my share of womens underwear/nightwear in my time...   

       *ahem*   

       ..my mother was a lingerie designer.
Helium, Feb 11 2002
  

       we know you for the liar you are... perv..
po, Feb 11 2002
  

       Shouldn't this be a reverse-worn bra for supporting the wings when not in flight?
waugsqueke, Feb 11 2002
  

       po, who are you calling a liar and/or perv?
thumbwax, Feb 12 2002
  

       can't remember now, if the cap fits....
po, Feb 12 2002
  

       curiouser and curiouser
thumbwax, Feb 12 2002
  

       lets keep Alice out of this
po, Feb 12 2002
  

       No comment.
angel, Feb 12 2002
  

       <||
( : D
<||
thumbwax, Feb 12 2002
  

       shame!
po, Feb 12 2002
  

       shamelessly says "check out the new link"
thumbwax, Feb 12 2002
  

       If I was an angel I'd have huge ass black crow wings and 44ddd boobs. I'd wear a bra made from grape leaves sewn together with the purest silk.   

       Since I'm only human I would score with any angel with huge wings and boobs, bra or no bra.
harp1369, Apr 26 2002
  

       does anyone know how you could get usable wing attachments. you can now grow some skin in labs and there working on organs so do you think they could grow wings and make them work. i know you can get metal wings if you really wanted much like getting a spine or shoulder piercing but not usable; anyone know if there has been a successful usable wing transplant
phynxlili, Feb 03 2008
  

       Usable for what? If you wanted to flap them and take off, then I believe you'd need not just to add wings but also add a probably unfeasible volume of chest muscle, and/or lose a *lot* of weight from the rest of your body (and not just fat - I believe birds have hollow bones).   

       If you'd be happy with hang-gliding implants, that might be easier.
pertinax, Feb 03 2008
  

       //does anyone know how ...// I hate to have to tell you this, [phynxlili], but no- one without capital letters can fly, ever. [P] o, I'm sorry you had to find out this way.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 04 2008
  

       [Pottedstu] you have made a great point about jockstraps (see link)
bhumphrys, Feb 06 2008
  

       [m]B, does the humble fly have a capital? it flies...
po, Feb 06 2008
  

       Amusing point of Halfbakery anthropology -   

       [harp1369], who annoed above on 04/26/02, has never posted an idea.   

       [harp1369], however, has annoed on no less than 10 other ideas.   

       All of them being about either bras or breasts.
normzone, Feb 06 2008
  

       Bravo [normzone]
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Feb 06 2008
  

       ha ha!   

       did we do harp bra? oops, I think I did something similar.
po, Feb 06 2008
  

       Does the fact that [normzone] has excavated this fascinating fact say more about the boob-obsessed baker, or the one interested enough in boob obsession to perform such an excavation project. Full disclosure: I love boobs too.
globaltourniquet, Feb 06 2008
  

       is 1369 significant? <linky>
po, Feb 06 2008
  
      
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