Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'

h a l f b a k e r y
Trying to contain nuts.

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, best, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: Browse anonymously, or get an account and write.

User:
Pass:

or Create a new account.


             
Please log in.
If you're not logged in, you can see what this page looks like, but you will not be able to add anything.



Apothegmatic Assistant
"I'm the kind of guy your mother warned you about."
  (-4)
(-4)
  [vote for,
against]


We all know the feeling: Someone makes a clever observation in conversation and we're not sure whether it is appropriate, or not.

The Apothegmatic Assistant is a cultural reference database of aphorisms and quotes from popular literature, to allow the perplexed victim to determine the suitability of such witticisms to the circumstances.

With the global spread of faster communication systems, such as email, it is increasingly likely that previously isolated idiom will manifest itself in new fora.

No longer wonder whether "screwed the pooch" is as nasty as it sounds.


UnaBubba, Sep 07 2003



Annotation:







       Are you looking for a stud?

thumbwax, Sep 07 2003
  

       He'll be trying to impress the wallflowers.

UnaBubba, Sep 07 2003
  

       An idea somewhat like this exists internally at my company as a system known as "Poli-Check." It is a content-checking tool designed to search for sensitive geopolitical terms and phrases for documents, documentation and even Web sites, to make sure that, if they are circulated globally, they don't contain things that could be potentially offensive in another culture.   

       Call it an outgrowth of the live and learn method of making friends and influencing people--or not, as the case has been--it has saved many a manager's bacon since it's inception.

bristolz, Sep 07 2003
  

      
“Charlene, did you see what UB said?”
“No, what?”
“Screwed the pooch!”
“Hah! Charlie did that once.”
I was stunned. I dropped the loaf of cards right there on the floor.
“What did you do that for?” Charlene said.
“You said Charlie screwed the pooch!”
“No, I didn’t. I said he fucked up.”
“Oh,” I said, wondering if that was an improvement, “for a minute I thought he'd done something to Fluffy.”
“Well, he won’t anymore. I told that Charlie Mihalak to keep his wanking hands off, or I’d bobbit his johnson.”
That’s when I started feeling dizzy, and called an apothegmatic assistant.

pluterday, Sep 07 2003
  

       What was dizzy's reaction to your apparently unwanted advances?   

       Don't you just hate that it has become acceptable not to capitalise proper nouns, these days?   

       [bristolz], that's the sort of thing. I am aware of an instance where Mitsubishi Motors began selling their Pajero model in Spanish-speaking countries, and renamed it, as the word is also colloquial Spanish for "lazy, foolish wanker" or something similar. It's called a Montero, I believe?

UnaBubba, Sep 07 2003
  


 
back: main index
 business 
 computer 
 culture 
 fashion 
 food 
 halfbakery 
 home 
 other 
 product 
 public 
 science 
 sport 
 vehicle