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Audio Ear Swabs

Encourages aural health
  (+9)(+9)
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Quite pleased with an over the counter Scented Nose Picker previously purchased, the customer returned to the store for the Audio Ear Swab kit.

The kit contained one battery powered Audio Ear Swab and hundreds of disposable cotton tips. By placing a fresh tip on the swab and inserting it just into the opening of the ear canal and cleansing in a circular motion the audio is activated.

Just as the Scented Nose Picker reinforces regular use and clean nostrils by releasing pleasant aromas, the Audio Ear Swabs can play your favourite MP3s or some pre-recorded compliments:
'Eres to good health!
'Eres looking at you kid!
'Eres a cute tip - clean your ears!
Uncleanliness is next to dogliness
Wax puts the ring into hearing
Audio Ear Swabs puts the ear into hearing.

Audio Ear Swabs are mainly to be used for cosmetic purposes, as ear wax is a healthy although unpleasant substance.

rcarty, Sep 30 2008

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       Nice Idea.
Now then, can I ask, as a lug'ole waxifactor meself, enquire as to whether or not an iPhone/iTune player can power this device?. In the good old days I am sure that a Sony Walkman could do it.
gnomethang, Sep 30 2008
  

       Right, I guess this device would plug in just like headphones. That's probably a better idea than I have posted here, except it wouldn't be able to control the device output.
rcarty, Sep 30 2008
  

       Tempted to post dildo shower head. <refrains> This anno is bad enough.
zeno, Sep 30 2008
  

       Positive reinforcement is wonderful, in this modern age men and women have better maintained seminal vesicles and Skene's Glands, respectively, than ever before.
rcarty, Sep 30 2008
  

       Waxing audiosophical.   

       What if Google or, worse, the Chinese secret service, hijacks it and pipes commercial or propaganda messages instead?
doanviettrung, Oct 02 2008
  

       I think Eminem is already doing that, isn't he?
UnaBubba, Oct 02 2008
  

       where can i get this nose picker? why oh why don't we give these out free, for all guys that like picking their noses at traffic lights or on public transport when they think no one is looking?
williamsmatt, Oct 02 2008
  

       With a little bit of decent tech, I would prefer a running commentary.   

       "Otitis externa detected at 4mm in..."   

       "Abnormal quantities of oils detected, uploading appointment with ENT.."   

       "Water detected within ear canal, recommend two drops tea-tree oil twice daily..."   

       And perhaps a transmitted image to your smart phone.
4whom, Oct 04 2008
  

       Comes preloaded with Nightmares On Wax.
wagster, Oct 04 2008
  
      
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