h a l f b a k e r yA dish best served not.
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Breath freshener spray can, filled with a mild paralysing agent, to render the user's vocal cords inoperable for ten to twenty minutes.
May be administered by squirting a cloud of it in front of the target, if they stop to take a breath.
Useful for treating motormouth kids; offensively loud yobbos
at sporting events; people who sing tunelessly while wearing their iPod/Walkman on the bus or train; Ol' Uncle Havachat, etc...
[link]
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Tidy. I think this could also possibly come in an expanding foam option for that more permanent calming effect in persistent cases. |
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I think you've got something here, except nobody
ever owns up to being mouthy. |
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it's used defensively bliss, not voluntarily |
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I wish I'd had the purse size version a few years back. I won't bore you with the details. |
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Guaranteed to find a niche market among rapists and assassins,
and probably illegal since paralyzing agents of the type you
envision are usually controlled substances. (Neutral) |
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I'd be happier with legalising pick-axe handles. |
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Knives, alcohol, rope, handcuffs and handguns also have a ready market among rapists and wrongdoers, too. That doesn't curb their availability if you really want to obtain them, [21Q]. |
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I shudder to think how many times people would use this on me, if they got the chance. |
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Market research at the School Management Committee meeting tonight would indicate this product may sell faster than lifeboats on the Titanic. |
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There was a scarily unhinged old lady on the bus today who took umbrage at a schoolboy who she thought was looking at her funny, and launched into a 5 minute racially sensitive tirade to tell him so. |
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Often (though I've not seen him for a while) there's another chap who sits at the front of the bus, taking up two seats who talks his thoughts out loud between taking sips of his large McDonalds drink. He sometimes rocks back and forth and occasionally the thoughts he (apparently unknowingly) shares with the rest of upper deck are of a violent, or sexually explicit nature - he usually gets to keep the spare seat next to him. |
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So there are times when I might have welcomed a waft of this stuff at various points during my rides on public transport - and while the commuter experience certainly isn't known for its chatty and communicative nature, sometimes it really is just better for everyone that way. |
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