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Beer Warmer
Don't forget, there are Englishmen coming, tonight. | |
Occasionally, when people from some of the... unusual cultures are in attendance, it is necessary to cater to cultural differences.
Specifically, I refer to the British fascination with serving beer at room temperature.
To achieve this, without creating a situation where allpatrons are inconvenienced,
the UB Kiddinme Beer Warmer will efficiently and rapidly raise the temperature of chilled ales and lagers to a comfortable blood temperature, in just over a minute.
Daisy, the cow, seems to like it, and the Brits at the party think it's way cool.
Temperature to drink beer at
http://www.xs4all.n...tto1ro/beertemp.htm
[Ian Tindale, Apr 13 2006]
Chemicals in beer: look about half way down.
http://www.realbeer...light=&pagenumber=3
Allowed amounts of chemicals in 'Beer' in the U.S.
[Ling, Apr 13 2006]
Fat on froth for DocB
http://www.ifrn.bbs...Sheets/EDPBeer.html
keep your beard out of your beer, drbobby [po, Apr 13 2006]
Guinness Surger.
http://www.guinness...NRCACHEHINT%3dGuest
I had to pretend to be in Ireland to get into the site! [po, Apr 13 2006]
why the British drink warm beer
http://www.lucas-el...ucas/lucasnews.html
</obligatory Lucas Electrical joke> [ato_de, Apr 13 2006]
Annotation:
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Yank that I am, I just leave some out, or run the container under hot water for a couple of minutes. |
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You haven't addressed the technical issues. No microwaves, please. |
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Inconsiderate that I am, I just don't care and serve them cold beer anyway. |
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The technical issues are self explanatory. [UB] puts the beers in Daisy's rectum. She likes it because lately she's been having some haemorrhoids problems and the brits are chuffed because their beer is warm. Finito |
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Methinks [methinksnot] thinks not unlike me. |
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The thing is, it's not supposed to be room temperature either. Real ale (or even pretend ale) and bitter should be served at cellar temperature. This is fairly constant year round, and is the temp that fermentation of ale occurs at, and the temp that beer is kept at traditionally. These days, of course, that's all subject to change. |
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Lager, on the other hand, is fermented at a much lower temp, and is often served cold. The trouble with serving bitter at such a cold temperature is that it's too cold to taste the flavours - it simply numbs the tongue, it's so cold. In the case of most commercially produced lager, this is actually an advantage as there's little taste there in the first place. In the case of a finely crafted bitter, serving it so cold is a dreadful waste - you're missing an entire sensory aspect of what might be a splendid beer. |
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Room temperature, though, is admittedly too warm - it's against nature and should be avoided. Stick to cellar temperature. |
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all real beer is served at room temperature... you are of
course referring to that mass produced, chemical cocktail
of gas inflated crap called lager. (+ for a worthy sentiment
though) |
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hah, this so reminds me of the advert for australian lager that has a dweeby ozzy character who, when presented with a tall, beautiful and obviously interested female, perceives her shape as merely a sunshade for his drink. weird! |
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Yeah, Fosters.Warm or cold still tastes like shit.Next time you pop over I'll have a keg waiting for you and I'll be wearing a large forward facing mullet to shade your midi. |
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I like both beer and lager, but if I am drinking the latter I try to stick to the ones that follow the Reinheitsgebot. It amazes me how many people are willing to consume (often in stupendous quantity)a beverage with no ingredients listing whatsoever. There could be anything in there!I know in certain parts of Africa and Asia they still use formaldehyde as a preservative. Drink too much of that stuff and the stomach ache on top of the hangover is horrible. |
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Utilising advanced techniques of sigmoidoscopy, it might be possible to hook Daisy up into the draught system, effectively serving traditional brews on draught at Cow temperature. |
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// Drink too much of that stuff and the stomach ache on top of the hangover is horrible// |
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I consumed WAY too much Singha once and nearly went blind.Of course it's horse crap that it contains formaldehyde but I couldn't see a bloody thing in front of me (maybe it was the Mekong :) |
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//maybe it was the Mekong // What, the little floaty green dude from Dan Dare? |
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I saw that before my sight went. |
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It could be called Quadruple-bov* distilled... |
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I don't know about Singha but I have heard from multiple sources that beer in some areas does contain formaldehyde, and I've personally experienced a horrible ache in my stomach the day after drinking 3 or 4 bottles of local beer in some developing countries (Senegal, Gambia, Cambodia to name three) . In each case, the sensation was the same and was unaccompanied by any other symptoms so I don't think it was a stomach bug. What's so preposterous about the idea [skin]? |
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Nothing,[Doc] did I give that impression? |
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//of course it's horse crap that it contains formaldehyde// I read that as your doubting it was possible that formaldehyde was used in this manner! |
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Oh, I see. What I meant was in Singha, I know it's used in Chinese beer. |
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See link for chemicals. Is there any space left for the beer? |
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That's it. From now on I drink only rum and homemade poitin. |
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There is an interesting test that you can do to determine whether your beer is actually real beer or just chemical soup. It involves pouring a small quantity of milk into the glass. If the head on the beer is still there afterwards then it's a horrendous chemical cocktail whereas if the head disappears then it's a proper beer and you've just ruined it.
Anyway, what Tindale said. That man knows his ale. |
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I'm intrigued [DrBob]. Any science to go with that test? Does it work for lagers too or just beers? |
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It has something to do with the fat that is contained in the milk. When serving a beer you also need to make very sure that the glass is fat free. This is why you often can't get a good bit of head on the beer at home. You have washed the glass in the same water and same sink you wash the pots and pans in and you've dried it with the same cloth. To make the glass fat free you can clean it with warm water with a drop of ammonia which will evaporate afterwards. |
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<Removes tongue from cheek> |
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I detest beer. It all tastes as though it was filtered through a dog. |
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UB //It all tastes as though it was filtered through a dog//
can we have a photograph please, of you demonstrating
this method of testing? and do you have other filtration
animals on standby to sample your weekly shopping? |
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"How's the flavour of that new cheese dearest?" - "Just
waiting for Benjie to finish squeezing out the last drop -
honey before I sample it" (Benjie being the pet camel of
course) |
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//It all tastes as though it was filtered through a dog// Ah! That'll be the Castlemaine XXXX - Fosters tastes like it is filtered through cats. |
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Pilsener, Heineken, Carlsberg, Steinlager, Tusker, Budweiser, Beck's, Grolsch, Guiness... they're all horsepiss in bottles. |
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Pretty much the same principles of temperature of serving applies to wines, too. |
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[UB], I notice that Guinness is not a lager as the rest of your list. I'm not advocating for, or detracting from the taste of it. Just interested why you categorise it with the rest? |
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Anyone here that is a real ale officionado have any opinion on Guinness? |
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I was going to open up the debate to stout in general - but thought I would stick with the Guinness. |
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No one that I hang out with likes it. So when we're partying or casually drinking, I get it all to myself. I used to do the same with Fat Tire back in the day, but that stuff is just vile. |
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Guinness, Murphys and the like, are
modelled after a traditional
London Docklands stout, called a
porter. The dark roast malts with their
complex tones were a favourite
refreshment for the dock workers after
a hard day's graft, if they were lucky
enough to have any work on any given
day. |
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Much of their time was spent
waiting to be assigned any work, as
they worked on a piecemeal freelance
basis. Dock workers and porters would
often be seen standing around smoking
while hoping to acquire a day's work.
If this came, as it often would, they'd
have to fairly quickly stub out the
cigarette and make haste - hence the
term 'docking' a cigarette, for
extinguishing a partly smoked one. |
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Quite what this traditional London brew
has to do with Dublin, I'll never know,
except perhaps that both cities were
major ports in their heyday (but so were
most - we don't associate a dark stout
porter with any shipping and trading
city you care to name). |
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A traditional
stout porter would often comprise a
mix of beers - not necessarily a single
brew - and often masking older brews
with newer and/or stronger brews.
Nothing wrong with that, of course. |
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//Pilsener, Heineken, Carlsberg, Steinlager, Tusker, Budweiser, Beck's, Grolsch, Guiness... they're all horsepiss in bottles// |
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Steinlager used to be good, before they changed the formula to tame it down. |
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Two questions, [UB]. What is your poison of choice, and what kind of horse? |
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Ah, I did some work at Guinness, Park Royal, London. They changed the way it's brewed about 14/15 years ago. I was told that the new way means that all the beer they brew at that site starts off the same way. Including Lager. |
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So UB is right, if you consider the last 15 years. But before that it was different. |
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It was good to work there: the canteen was decorated in the colours of Guinness, with a creamy ceiling. At the end of the row of very good food counters was an area where you could pour yourself a Guinness, to have with your meal. |
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//What is your poison of choice// bottled water, believe it or not. |
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not if it's bottled salty water. |
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I have a friend who owns a pub in Amsterdam and he says
that Grolsche is so pure and chemical free that it could
be sold as a "health" drink. This same guy is very,very
careful about everything he eats and drinks. The rest of
UB's I agree with, apart from Guinness - which is in a
special category of its own, and tastes like the sweat from
an Aussie's armpit anywhere outside of Ireland, North or
South of the border. |
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