Autotune is increasingly used, either as an effect in its
right (a la Cher), or to "improve" the vocals of inept
However, it does lack a certain naturalness, tending
towards Stephen Hawking.
MaxCo. has been deeply troubled by this for the last, oh,
two or three minutes, and
has hit upon a solution.
The surgery to affix the small bands of teflon-coated soft
iron to the vocal cords is relatively straightforward,
not dissimilar to method of attaching rings to birds' legs.
The rings are clamped tightly enough that they won't
wobble around or (and this is quite important) drop off
during a sneeze or a hiccup.
These bands will, by themselves, just lower the pitch of
the voice a little. With practice, the singer will adapt to
However, the bands come into their own when the
AutoTuneCollar (tm) is placed around the singer's neck.
Powerful coils in the collar are fed with the desired
frequency from a synthesizer, modulating the voice into
Gadulka! Pitch correction, yodel-style pitch changes,
enhanced vibrato are effortlessly attained. Of course, it
necessary that the singer's "natural" note is reasonably
to the driving frequency, but adjustments of a few
semitones should present no problem.
But wait - there's more!! By singing in a low key, and
feeding a higher frequency to the coils, the singer will
produce their own harmony! Like Tuvan Throat Singing,
but less unpleasant and much easier.
Best of all, if you stand close enough to the speakers at a
karaoke, you'll be bang on.