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Bolt and screw replacement service

Reduce the hassle
  (+7)
(+7)
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For reasons that can only be attributed to malice, many manufacturers assemble equipment with non-standard bolts and screws - torx, security torx, hex, star bits ...

This is irritating when it comes to dismantling the equipment for repair or maintenance.

BorgCo are creating a new service for consumers; simply send us your item and our skilled technicians will, using the correct tools, remove all the screws and bolts, replacing them with the correct size of standard (Philips, cross-head or plain slot - you choose) fixings, tightened to the correct torque.

The unit will then be shipped back to you.

All major credit cards accepted.

8th of 7, Jun 21 2016

iPhone Liberation Kit https://www.ifixit....ion-Kit/IF118-034-1
[ytk, Jun 22 2016]

Circular, featureless screw head http://www.instruct...-Much-Mor/?ALLSTEPS
See step 6. Also see the rest of the steps. Also bookmark. [notexactly, Jul 19 2016]

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       You're driving me nuts.
normzone, Jun 21 2016
  

       I can't think of anything for which this would be more economical than just buying the tools.
bs0u0155, Jun 21 2016
  

       As a service, this is an economic non-starter. I will wager [8th]s best silver egg-cup set that he would not be prepared to pay me £40 to replace the bolts holding his laptop together*.   

       Howevertheless, a company that sold screw- packages for named devices, along with cheap but serviceable tools for removing the existing ones, might work.   

       I quite often replace obscure screws and bolts with more conventional ones when servicing equipment, to make it easier next time; and I sometimes replace cross-heads with slot-heads for aesthetic reasons.   

       (*This strikes me as a bet which I cannot possibly lose.)
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 21 2016
  

       //I sometimes replace cross-heads with slot-heads for aesthetic reasons   

       Perhaps there's the germ of commercialization for this idea. Rather than the service reducing hassle, the service treats your device as a work of art and makes replacements based on aesthetic reasons or artistic statement. They might also replace connector ports based on pin-count harmony and perhaps remove or add buttons for balance.
the porpoise, Jun 21 2016
  

       You might be onto something there, [thepo]. There are companies that will pimp your car for you, using a range of aftermarket body kits. There would be even greater economies of scale in pimping, say, the latest model of LEC freezer, or the best-selling Dyson vacuum cleaner.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 21 2016
  

       Actually _all_ mechanical watches (except for the very, very cheapest ones, which tend not to be made these days) have a number of gemstone bearings. A typical mid-end watch movement will have between 10 and 20 jewels. However, they are synthetic rubies, and dirt cheap.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 21 2016
  

       // Is this related to that author’s previous “business” “idea” back in the ’70s //   

       Absolutely not, in any way. It's as completely different and innovative idea, bearing (ha, ha) no resemblance whatsoever to thast scheme - which, incidentally, was not a so-called "pyramid" scheme. Nothing was ever proven, and we had no responsibility for the trial being stopped on the first day because all the prosecution witnesses had suddenly contracted bruised kneecaps, broken fingers, loose teeth, and traumatic amnesia. Besides, it stated very clearly in the prospectus that the value of investments could go down as well as up, and it was pure coincidence that all the directors had the same Italian surname, came from Palermo, and had registered the company in Paraguay as a steam fishing trawler.
8th of 7, Jun 21 2016
  

       ...And also a near ideal material for that usage, certainly far better than nylon or any other conventional material.   

       My problem with this is that philips, cross-head and plain slot head bolts/screws are demonstrably inferior. Surely, if we want to arrive at a standard, it would be cap (allen) head bolts? We should agree on metric sizes too. In which case a hand tool about the size of two boxes of matches can contain every size you're likely to use on it, arrayed in a similar manner to a swiss army knife.
Custardguts, Jun 21 2016
  

       Hex-head bolts and screws would be acceptable - it depends what the client wants, though. After all, they're the ones paying a lot of money for a job they could quite easily do themselves at trivial cost. A lot like prostitution, when you think about it.
8th of 7, Jun 21 2016
  

       //philips, cross-head and plain slot head bolts/screws are demonstrably inferior.//   

       Without wishing to disagree, I disagree. Any of those above-mentioned screws can be operated with a wide range of readily available objects (a knife- point, a thin coin, a screwdriver of the wrong size or type), at a pinch. A hex-head fixturement can be operated only by the correct hex bit, or one of very nearly the right size.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 21 2016
  

       //I sometimes replace cross-heads with slot-heads for aesthetic reasons//

I trust that, in doing so, you align all the slots so that they are all parallel to one another and also parallel with or perpendicular to the edges of the thing into which they are screwed? [*]


* - Naturally, I realise that if you are putting screws into something which is, for example, circular, these two requirements are contradictory; in this case the requirement to make the slots parallel with the edge overrides the requirement to make all the slots parallel.
hippo, Jun 22 2016
  

       Croissant awarded, but only if the idea is altered and all screws are all replaced with chewing gum, and I get full credit for this fine suggestion.
xenzag, Jun 22 2016
  

       //A hex-head fixturement can be operated only by the correct hex bit// - not strictly true - I've taken these out without using any hex bits.
xenzag, Jun 22 2016
  

       ...And if you're rather tricky, you can get a hex head bolt out using two smaller hex head wrenches.   

       They're demonstrably superior at doing their job - that is allowing you to apply maximim torque. They're also more tolerant of corrosion.   

       Arguably - and I would argue this - they're not suited to being installed and removed with the wrong tools. Some would consider this a feature, not a flaw.
Custardguts, Jun 22 2016
  

       //I trust that, in doing so, you align all the slots so that they are all parallel to one another and also parallel with or perpendicular to the edges of the thing into which they are screwed?// Oddly enough, I do - at least when there is enough tolerance in the degree of tightening to make this possible.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 22 2016
  

       //Howevertheless, a company that sold screw- packages for named devices, along with cheap but serviceable tools for removing the existing ones, might work.//   

       There's a company that sells such a thing specifically for replacing the proprietary pentalobe screws used in the iPhone with standard Phillips screws. They call it the “iPhone Liberation Kit”. <link>
ytk, Jun 22 2016
  

       // you align all the slots so that they are all parallel to one another and also parallel with or perpendicular to the edges of the thing into which they are screwed// Could this service cut slots after the relative rotational alignment in the product had been determined?   

       I imagine getting the complex interaction between the two threads and any spacers is pretty complex and making a slot align to within a degree or so would be a considerable engineering challenge for anyone. I imagine high-end automotive and hi-fi would be ideal applications.
bs0u0155, Jun 23 2016
  

       Pah, to make the slots line up perfectly...hammer the buggers in! See? There's a solution for everything!
Ling, Jun 23 2016
  

       //making a slot align to within a degree or so would be a considerable engineering challenge for anyone.//   

       No no no. You just need 179 sets of screws, each set having a different angular offset between the thread and the slot. You start with set 0, measure the angle of the slot when suitably tight, and then fit the appropriate alternative.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 23 2016
  

       hmmm, fold-down recessed wing-nuts and cotter-pins.   

       One tool assembly and disassembly of all Fry-co products with a lifetime warrantee.   

       //You just need 179 sets of screws, each set having a different angular offset between the thread and the slot.//   

       For a slot head you need 179, hex/torx are the affordable alternative!
bs0u0155, Jun 23 2016
  

       What's needed, then, is to go beyond hex/torx. We need more sides - many, many more.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 23 2016
  

       Hmm...circular screw heads...too stupid to try?
the porpoise, Jun 23 2016
  

       I think circular bolt heads are baked. At least I have seen many mechanics transform hexagonal heads into more pleasing round heads using a special vice-grip or mulgrip tool, which I believe were invented specially for this purpose.
Ling, Jun 23 2016
  

       We specifically put star-heads on belt tensioner pulley bolts so that people won't try and loosen the tensioner by using said pulley bolt when they go to change the belt. It tends to louse up the pulley alignment when they do.   

       It is mostly for reasons of dealing with Trump / Brexit voters that we use nonstandard fastener heads. Letting them dismantle things, well, we've seen the result already, haven't we?   

       If Britain had used some more specialized fasteners in its adherence to the EU back in the day we wouldn't be where we are now.
RayfordSteele, Jun 27 2016
  

       or you can get a set of security bits from ebay for $9 and feel like the king of the universe
bob, Jul 04 2016
  

       // a smaller country similar to, for example, Malta, //   

       That's hardly fair on Malta, for so many reasons.
8th of 7, Jul 05 2016
  

       Isn't Malta the only country fatter than Scotland? I seem to remember at the time of the Scottish referendum that had Scotland left, the rest of the UK would have fallen several places in the world obesity ranking. Then I found out that Scotland is holding the UK above France in the worldwide league table of excellent booze drinkers. From that moment I was against Scottish independence, the thought of losing to France in such an important area was less palatable than an Irn Bru Martini
bs0u0155, Jul 19 2016
  

       Pentalobe screw? Replace orange juice with a passion fruit and triple sec, little umbrella and you've got your replacements.
dentworth, Jul 20 2016
  


 

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