Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Burgerfocal Glasses

 Compress fast food illustrations to avoid disappointment
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Always don these spectacles upon entering a hamburger or other fast food chain. When purveying the menu images above the counter through these highbrow lenses, all objects will appear to have been sat upon by a baby elephant. Thus, as you sit and unwrap your order, you will experience no shock or disillusionment.

Accompanying, designated others will appreciate that everyone passing by you will appear to have a squashed upper body.

—FarmerJohn, Sep 29 2002

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       Be sure to take them off before eating the aforementioned burger, lest it give the appearance of having been caught between the buffers of two high speed trains colliding.
—UnaBubba, Sep 29 2002
   

       Combine with those laser glasses for very strange effects. Give a pair to your local UFO chaser and watch the headlines explode!
—madradish, Sep 29 2002
   

       <Clara Peller>Where's the beef?</Clara Peller>
—thumbwax, Sep 29 2002
   

       And the lower body remains unchanged?
—hollajam, Sep 29 2002
   

       Don't wear them to look at your croissant.
—TeaTotal, Sep 29 2002
   

       I feel what I need slipping through my fingers --- mmmm.
—reensure, Sep 29 2002
   

       reensure... could you rephrase that?
—thumbwax, Sep 29 2002
   

       Yes.
—reensure, Sep 29 2002
   

       hollajam: Yes.
—FarmerJohn, Sep 29 2002
   


 

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