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Camshaft Shazam

An app to diagnoze engine noise
  (+16, -2)(+16, -2)
(+16, -2)
  [vote for,
against]

Just what it says -- use an app on your phone to listen to engine noise, and diagnose any potential problems with the engine.
theircompetitor, Nov 10 2012

Much better idea than my idea http://gizmodo.com/...ral&utm_source=t.co
[theircompetitor, May 27 2013]

App and tool you plug into diagnostic https://fixdapp.com/
[theircompetitor, Apr 24 2017]

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       It might just work..... is that what you want to hear on this site though? [+]
xenzag, Nov 10 2012
  

       I met someone who was working on an audio diagnosis system for trains. A stationary track-side microphone would (briefly) listen to each wheel as the train passed, and hopefully pick up any bearing rattle or whatever, using software.
spidermother, Nov 10 2012
  

       Does it have an option to listen to noises when the engine isn't running? For woodworm and the like?   

       [+], although I suggest it would be difficult to tell some of the taps and rattles apart.
TomP, Nov 12 2012
  

       [TomP] Even if true, a list of possible things that create that particular noise would be a better starting point than we've currently got. At the very least it gives you a place to point the mechanic (if you trust them) or a way to crosscheck them (if you don't).
MechE, Nov 12 2012
  

       [sucks through teeth] Thats gonna cost ya
PainOCommonSense, Nov 12 2012
  

       I am imagining a mobile phone app for car problem detection, the beauty is that just like other apps it doesn't even really have to work very well.
PainOCommonSense, Nov 12 2012
  

       If you need a phone app to diagnose audible signals from an IC engine, you richly deserve to have your engine sieze solid.   

       Bone for de-skilling proles even more than they are already.
8th of 7, Nov 12 2012
  

       'Fraid this wouldn't be practical. Every car has their own sound, every failure its own unique signature as heard from different locations, etc.
RayfordSteele, Nov 12 2012
  

       I am no expert but I can normally judge when an alternator is going, in I am guessing quite a few different makes and models, surely this is of some value?   

       As for de-skilling proles, just wait till you dial up your destination in your rented google car, My guess is Taxi Drivers in Tokyo, NY & London would be given circa 10 years at best before they are phased out, by a glorified up market (Web cam + Sat Nav) combo.
PainOCommonSense, Nov 13 2012
  

       Welcome to the future: "I need to take a sh@, where's my phone?".
WcW, Nov 13 2012
  

       And a few years after that: "Do I need to take a Sh@? Where's my phone?"
WcW, Nov 13 2012
  

       The app could use the accelerometer if available. In fact, vibration analysis for preventive maintenance is done using accelerometers [+]
piluso, Nov 14 2012
  

       I don't know - my gut feeling is that there are just too many things to listen to here. Your car might have a slightly rusted exhaust system which will be fine for another 50,000 miles but which produces a noise which is 'non-standard' and which conceals the really interesting noise you should be listening for in the transmission. Then, quite a lot of the time you want to listen to noises while you're on the move and the engine is under load, but you'll have to find a way to get throught the road noise.
hippo, Nov 14 2012
  

       A very good idea, me thinks. +
blissmiss, Nov 14 2012
  

       Nice idea.   

       Should be doable to a certain extent, but not easily, and not without a serious amount of research, sampling, etc. to develop.   

       The biggest question is... does it come with a voice feedback which knows when to go:   

       "*teeth sucking noise* I don't like the sound of that. It's going to be expensive!"   

       I guess it'd need a serious disclaimer to avoid 'claims r us' costs sue to mis/false/un-diagnosed issues leading to either unneeded repairs or untreated problems getting worse/more expensive to fix.
Skrewloose, Nov 14 2012
  

       Now, if your car could output its diagnostic data as audio ...
BunsenHoneydew, Dec 06 2012
  

       ...and play it through your stereo really loud at stoplights...
normzone, Dec 06 2012
  

       Ok, I am going to bun the idea,but only presuming the app does the output via a CGI Lassie....."What's that Lassie? Tappets on number 4 cylinder.."
not_morrison_rm, May 28 2013
  

       [n_m-r]'s Lassie: Your engine is running... ruff.
AusCan531, May 28 2013
  

       //"What's that Lassie? Tappets on number 4 cylinder.."//   

       The answer is obvious here isn't it? Dogs have a much better hearing range and sensitivity compared to humans. They are also reasonably good at processing that information in varied environments, and can combine it with input from their other senses.   

       "I'm sorry to say Mr Griffiths, we got a Lab report on your Accord... our best Lab in fact, Benji, he's uncanny with VTEC engines if we offer him a bit of bacon. Anyway, he had a smell at the exhaust he's picked up pollen and perfume from the air filter, the perfume matches the passenger seat. He's smelling cooked spark plugs, but the catalytic converter's clean. 5 minutes 'round the front and he had a good idea. We opened up the tank and he had it nailed instantly. I'm sorry to say Mr Griffiths, but your teenage son has borrowed your car to take out a girl who was between 9-11 of her particular... er.. woman's cycle, you want to be careful there... anyhow, he's been thrashing it out in forest, passing 5 cats, a Nandos and Mr Wagglesworth the west Highland terrier's house, to impress her but he's cheap so he filled it up with the cheap stuff half way 'round... that wouldn't normally matter only your knock sensor isn't working and now you've had some detonation. I'm afraid it's the beginnings of rod knock and scorched plugs, and you'll need to clean the back seats"
bs0u0155, Apr 24 2017
  

       Now, if your car could output its diagnostic data as audio ... — BunsenHoneydew, Dec 06 2012   

       ...and play it through your stereo really loud at stoplights... — normzone, Dec 06 2012   

       With all the business addresses on the google now, when you paused at the stop light in front of a mechanic's the car could shout for help.
normzone, Apr 24 2017
  

       Actually, I think you could just upload the sounds to YouTube or whatever. Eventually you'll crowdsource the whole deal.
bs0u0155, Apr 24 2017
  

       Actually, I think you could just upload the sounds to YouTube or whatever. Eventually you'll crowdsource the whole deal.
bs0u0155, Apr 24 2017
  

       This might work. I have an app for timing watches (mechanical wristwatches), and it is pretty remarkable - it will listen to the watch and report the rate, amplitude, beat error and (I think) lift angle, just from hearing the ticks.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 25 2017
  

       I wonder if any submarine ever laid off firing a torpedo, because it could hear the enemy ship was soon going the spend six months in port due to engine trouble.   

       Or vice versa with depth charges.
popbottle, Apr 26 2017
  

       //because it could hear the enemy ship was soon going the spend//   

       ...an unfortunate amount of time acquainting itself with the intricacies of norovirus..
bs0u0155, Apr 27 2017
  


 

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