Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
RIFHMAO
(Rolling in flour, halfbaking my ass off)

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Cat Hair Remover

"Excuse me, sir, you appear to be shedding."
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We all know the problem. A dark suit, skirt or trousers and every cat within a mile wants to rub on your leg. Fear the fur no more!

UB-Clean Labs is seeking appropriate patents for the ultimate cat fur removal brush.

Our highly skilled team of scientists have put thousands of hours of research into development of a synthetic cat's tongue material. The "Cat's Tongue" is then bonded to lightweight handles, and moistened with synthetic cat saliva prior to use.

Our state of the art facility has produced a fake cat saliva so "real" that you can't tell it from the real thing.

The brush is constantly immersed in an attractive silver hipflask of pure, laboratory grade catspit. The flask is designed to fit into an inside coat pocket without ruining the line of your expensive suit. A ladies compact version is under development.

Simply pull the Tongue from the flask, briskly brush the fur from your apparel and pop the Tongue back into the flask. No-one will suspect you looked as though a Persian moggy had slept of top of you, just moments earlier.

To remove the furball from the "tongue" simply swish through running water a few times.

UnaBubba, Mar 26 2004

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       I softened my stance on feral cats, in a moment of weakness. One of my cats is sitting on my lap, while I 'bake.
UnaBubba, Mar 26 2004
  
      
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