h a l f b a k e r ySuperficial Intelligence
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, best, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
browse anonymously,
or get an account
and write.
register,
|
|
|
A normal-looking chandelier by day. However, in darkness hours it sets itself to occasionally come to life and scare the crap out of you... but only if it senses everyone in the room is sound asleep.
Then it plays a thunderous soundtrack of mayhem and hovering helicopters, the panicked sounds of
terrified cattle, muffled shouts and violent thunderstorms.
All the while, intensely bright searchlights and strobes flash around the room, blinding the now awake and thoroughly confused occupants.
Then it abruptly switches itself off, leaving you wondering whet the hell happened to you and whether it will happen again. With repeated episodes, over time, you begin to believe you have been abducted by aliens, causing you untold trouble in your personal relationships and in the damage it does to your creditworthiness.
Perfect for christmas, for your loopy uncle and his freaky, new-age bimbo, third wife.
[link]
|
| |
Not just yes... but Hell yes! [+] |
|
| |
I was thinking of that whole "bright lights, shaking the crockery" thing they used to use as a plot device in X-Files. |
|
| |
Ah yes, the "Chicken Vindaloo" effect ... |
|
| |
I have an idea here, to that effect. |
|
| |
The idea fails to live up to the awesome title. |
|
| |
May also be programmed to spray you with ectoplasm; talk to you in a whisper all night to affect your subconscious; lower slowly from the ceiling and sit on your chest while you sleep and interfere maliciously with other electrical appliances around the house, under cover of darkness. |
|
| |
In short, install one, and your nightmares have a field day. |
|
| |
it has to whisper your name and suggestive propositions in a hot dead girls voice too. |
|
| |
or maybe just broken, ragged, labored breathing with an occasional moan and the word "braaaaaaiiins...." off in the distance. |
|
| |
the artificial fly slowly crawls across the sleeping victims face, trailing an indelible ink out of his nose, down his cheek and back up into his ear just in time for the lights and alarm to go off. |
|
| |