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For those who haven't seen a Chupa-Chup, they are a round lollipop whose name means "Suck-Suck" in Spanish. The Spanish company has now sold out to an Italian company, I think, though they are still sold worldwide. They are notoriously difficult to unwrap.
Earlier this year, when Bubba Jr was still
6, he came to me with a detailed drawing of a machine. It consisted of a hopper into which you pour a bucketful of Chupa-Chups. Press the button and a single lollipop makes its way to a small conveyor belt that takes it up to the top of the machine.
It is then grasped tightly by the stick and dangled over a tank filled with Cookie-Cutter Sharks (They're less than a foot long, with small, sharp teeth. They feed by taking a bite and thrashing around until a circular chunk comes off their victim.) A shark will come up & bite the dangling Chupa-Chup, its teeth shredding the wrapper before it lets go in frustration as the Chupa-Chup is pulled away from the edge of the tank. The machine then releases a small food treat to the shark.
The Chupa-Chup then rolls out onto a tray, to be eaten, while the wrapper is stripped off by a rubber hand and rolls into a waiting bin.
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Hah! I just told him that I posted his idea to the bakery. He's absolutely chuffed. |
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yer progeny appears to have a promising future as a Baker. |
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He's a very imaginative lad. He had quite a lot of ideas on what we should do when we remodelled our house when he was four. |
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Had it been up to him there would be a stream through the kitchen, with a stone bridge over a pool with a crocodile to eat the kitchen scraps. The idea was to save us having to take them to the bin in the dark each night. |
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An eminently practicable solution to a very real problem. I do feel a bit sorry for the sharks though; is there any way they could be allowed to have a chupa-chup every so often for their hard work. |
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I suppose they could have all of the fish-flavoured ones? |
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The only modification I could possibly come up with is that the Chupa-Chup must surely be forced to traverse a plank extended over the tank of toothy little snack-openers. You can then taunt it a bit before it's dropped to its doom, or show it a mercy and switch for another one if you decide it's not the flavor you wanted. |
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I saw a 4-lb Chupa-Chup at the World Market a few weeks ago. 'twas like a medieval mace of sweetness. |
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I need a box-o-ninjas over which I can hold those sealed and secure retail good packs of transparent steel. How do I control the ninjas? Easy, just show them a video of myself the last time I embedded a plastic shard into my finger whilst trying to rip away some packaging -- they'll be shocked and horrified into quiescence by the sight of my waving bloody hand and blood curdling howls. |
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Maybe the sharks could live in the kitchen stream instead of the crocodile and live on the kitchen scraps until needed? |
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They'd end up being cooked, in my kitchen. |
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As a father who's just assisted two kids unwrap Christmas presents including certain toys, [reensure], I'm with you. Barbie and Bratz dolls are simply not meant to be unwrapped, I have concluded. |
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<rant>Couldn't you surmise that //Barbie and Bratz dolls are simply not meant to be unwrapped// simply from the sheer skankitude of the dolls themselves?</rant> |
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Prolly, but their marketing campaigns have brainwashed little girls so wonderfully, cynically well! |
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If sharks can be made to do work, how about lamprays? Can lamprays be mounted with earbuds and made to hang onto my ear so I can use portable electronic devices without the silly earbuds falling out. |
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"Blessed be the package openers, for they shall be called feckless." --- Oaths 20:20 |
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Feckless? That doesn't describe my experience with the bloody things. |
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Never work- the stick will break. Shark wins. |
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We're obviously not getting the same Chupa-Chups, [mnc]. The sticks on the local ones seem to be made from solid indestructivium. |
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