Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'

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Close the Fridge Bees
Prevents food spoilage, saves energy, and produces fresh honey!
  (+37, -3)(+37, -3)(+37, -3)
(+37, -3)
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against]


Cold temperatures have a well known sedating effect on bees, and a preserving effect on perishable foodstuffs. Despite the knowledge we have of this latter quality of cold temperatures, some people have a habit of holding others' refrigerator doors open for extended periods of time, particularly while snacking.

This habit results in spoiled food, strain on the appliance, and most surprisingly, creating another natural vocation for our busy little friends the bee. That is, in addition to their current duties of producing delicious honey, selling Cheerios, pollinating, and prodigiously demonstrating where babies come from.

Close the Fridge Bees will soon be found in the freezer sections of participating pet stores. A small hive of these little flying tigers can be purchased packed in dry ice, brought home and quickly inserted into your refrigerator. Then simply protect yourself from liability by placing the 'Caution: Bees' sticker that is included with your purchase on the fridge door.

When the refrigerator door is held open for too long, the temperature inside goes up and the Close the Fridge Bees begin to reawaken. The increase in temperature combined with their fierce territoriality will propel the swarm towards the habitual door opener, providing them with the negative reinforcement required to break their habit.


rcarty, Feb 04 2006

Fun with bees http://www.ncbi.nlm...00063&dopt=Abstract
[Shz, Feb 05 2006]

Wasps http://boingboing.n...erforms_roachb.html
giddyap! [calum, Feb 06 2006, last modified Mar 29 2007]

[link]






       I can see the scenario now-   

       "Johnny? Where are you?" "In the kitchen, Mom!" "What are you doing?" "Nothing..." "Well stop standing there with the refrigerator door open!" "I'm not mom! I don't have the frige door open.. err... ummm.. MOM?" BUZZZZZZZZ!

Jscotty, Feb 04 2006
  

       I like it, but I'm waiting for the BEETA people to show up.   

       Can we work two crews alternately, so that I can get honey?

normzone, Feb 04 2006
  

       Bloody Genius!.

gnomethang, Feb 05 2006
  

       You shouldn't keep honey in the fridge. It gets too hard to spread.

UnaBubba, Feb 05 2006
  

       mmmmm...negative reinforcement with honey - you'll need a croissant with that. (+)

ConsulFlaminicus, Feb 05 2006
  

       To save the innocent bees from your nefarious scheme, I’ll be marketing a plastic, but otherwise realistic looking beehive that will attach to a back wall of the fridge. When the door is opened, it senses light. After a short delay, the (electronic, battery powered) buzzing begins, slowly building in amplitude. Hopefully, your children will have the courage to slam the door before they run away, shrieking.

ldischler, Feb 05 2006
  

       What about when your fridge breaks?   

       "Sweet Christ, they're eating my eyes!!"

notmarkflynn, Feb 05 2006
  

       /Or what? You'll release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you? /   

       - Homer Simpson.   

       Since hearing this quote, I have trying to devise a way that angry bees might be used to reinforce behavior. Thank you, [rcarty].

bungston, Feb 05 2006
  

       That classic quote always makes me laugh.

rcarty, Feb 05 2006
  

       MMMMmmm croissant smered with honey... Erm.. So you fibbed about the //produces fresh honey// bit? Yeah, still gets a hot-cross[+].

Dub, Feb 05 2006
  

       I keep visualising a swarm of bees collectively closing the fridge door. seen too many cartoons, I guess.

po, Feb 05 2006
  

       'Swarm out here!

UnaBubba, Feb 05 2006
  

       I used to take a picture of the fridge contents, print it and stick it on the outside, so the kids could stare at it as long as they wanted. It didn't work as well as this would have, I suspect.

Shz, Feb 05 2006
  

       Ow! Nasty stinging meanness! I imagined this as [po] decribed.
//selling Cheerios// [+]
reinforcing antisocial tendencies in bees [-]
Therefore, neutral.

moomintroll, Feb 06 2006
  

       A glass fronted fridge would probably help this problem to a large extent. But I don't want a glass fronted fridge - I want Close the Fridge Bees.

wagster, Feb 06 2006
  

       The problem with a glass front fridge is that the inside of my fridge is a mess!

mwburden, Feb 06 2006
  

       Sorry but I have to bone this, it's too drastic a measure. The habitual door opener might have alergies for starters. And once the swarm is released, they're going to be all over the food in the fridge.

spiritualized, Feb 06 2006
  

       Re: Bee behavior in the cold: One literally freezing cold winter night, I turned on the flood lights for my wife who would be home from work late. When she arrived the area around the lights was swarming with bees. She used the other door. I turned the lights out. The bees stayed where they were (on the screen door, side of the house, etc.) all night. They left in the light the next morning for their nest which I discovered high in a tree. I'm not sure what conclusions to draw from this, but it has some interesting implications.

Shz, Feb 06 2006
  

       I have a really bad image in mind of beehives in my fridge. Sorry, I hate this idea because if you have to get something from the back, or several items, you're going to be (bee?) screwed. Also, there is the very real possibility that after much time passes the bees will start to evolve and will no longer be pacified by the cold, or at least not as long. I'd much rather pay a higher electric bill than someone's medical bill. However, this could have an application in intruder defense... I'm staying neutral.

21 Quest, Feb 06 2006
  

       How do you get the bees back in the fridge?

Minimal, Feb 06 2006
  

       The offender, knowing that the only way to calm the bees is to make them cold, climbs into the fridge, where they will stay, squashed, stung and shivering until the bees drift off to sleep.

calum, Feb 06 2006
  

       well I'm not neutral - I think this is clever, funny and inventive. I also think there is more mileage in the properties of bees i.e. the soporific affect of smoke on a hive..... +

xenzag, Feb 06 2006
  

       Can someone reccommend me an insect that's cooler and more interesting than a bee? Termites come pretty close, but for me bees are the best insect on the planet.

spiritualized, Feb 06 2006
  

       Uh...wasps? Hornets? Mud-Daubers? Yellow-Jackets?

21 Quest, Feb 06 2006
  

       //Can someone reccommend me an insect that's cooler and more interesting than a bee? //   

       Giant burrowing cockroaches. Try Google. They are funky critters.

UnaBubba, Feb 06 2006
  

       very clever. + and it may soothe [theleopard] after this recent spate of "novelty" items.

k_sra, Sep 20 2007
  

       Certainly keeps them near the jam.

wagster, Sep 20 2007
  

       //A small hive of these little flying tigers//   

       sp: leopards

theleopard, Sep 20 2007
  

       "I keep visualising a swarm of bees collectively closing the fridge door. seen too many cartoons, I guess.   

       po, Feb 05 2006"   

       That's what I was thinking at first. Had my finger on the bone button until I read the actual idea.   

       Cute.

doctorremulac3, Sep 22 2007
  
      
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