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This weekend, gather a few friends, a few hundred disposable razors, a supply of ketamine, some clothesline and a coupla cases of shaving foam.
You know you want to be there when the farmer discovers his prize bull all bald & embarrassed.
Ketamine
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ketamine
developed by Parke-Davis in 1962 as part of an effort to find a safer anesthetic alternative to PCP [normzone, Aug 28 2009]
Kinda Baked, UB.
http://living.scots...-by-boys.2552757.jp
//... shaving rude words on to cows...// [21 Quest, Aug 28 2009]
Here's a demo pic
http://www.flickr.c...avallai/3319203005/
[21 Quest, Aug 28 2009]
[link]
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Is the K for the cow, or for the shavers? |
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I think a five gallon bucket of Nair and a couple of Super Soakers would be a safer alternative. Ketamine causes hallucinations among other side effects. |
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True, but vets use it to knock animals out so they can operate on them. |
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I think I'd like my bovines asleep while I was shaving them, to be honest. |
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Where's the sport in that? I was picturing a new Rodeo event. |
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Best to start smaller though, I think. Don't go for a full
grown cow straight away. In fact, don't even go the
whole hog. Start by shaving chickens, or a cock. |
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You got 21 Quest to search for cow shaving. Excellent. |
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// Start by shaving chickens, or a cock. // Don't screw up and forget the clothesline. |
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We're going to have to devise some method of keeping a record. |
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I'm not sure if quantity would be sufficient, maybe just an alphabetical list and the author of the idea who spurred [21]'s search. And we'd have to devise some minimum weirdness quotient. |
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Trimming cattle for showing is a lot different to shaving them completely bald, I fear. |
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It would expose them to sunburn and possible melanoma - the hair protects the skin from excessive sunlight. |
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True. That's not a problem if they're going to an abattoir soon anyway. |
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The meat wouldn't be much good. For the same reason beating
an animal prior to slaughtering it, the fear and shivering would
cause a rush of adrenaline that would make the meat taste
awful. At least, that's what I remember reading somewhere. I
think someone here actually pointed that out once, a couple
years ago. |
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I'm reminded of Yak Shaving Day in Ren and Stimpy. |
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[21] An explanation I heard recently is that stress before slaughter depletes the glycogen stores in the muscle, making it less tasty. |
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Probably why those pampered Kobe cows are so yummy. |
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//beating an animal prior to slaughtering it, the fear and shivering would cause a rush of adrenaline that would make the meat taste awful// |
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I've long wondered why the beef and lamb meals I had in Egypt and Pakistan were so bloody horrible. I simply put it down to the supposition that they were piss-poor cooks. |
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Or else they knew it was you. |
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If you were to carefully cover a freshly shaved cow with the bodies of yourself and your conspirators, the cow could hardly complain of cold. So, (21, Quest), the cow may actually taste better. Both alive (licking it in the ear) and dead (licking it in the sirloin). |
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You have some serious mental issues, mylodon. |
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"You've shaved your cow, now lie on it." |
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I wonder what quality the leather would take on? |
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