h a l f b a k e r yVeni, vedi, fish velocipede
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It's the bastard offspring of a Magic 8 Ball and a fortune cookie. |
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The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy noted just how annoying doorways that talked to you would be; I am moderately certain that would include doorstops. |
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thanks for that little gem from the world of sci- fi. a genre which, if it has taught us anything, it is that in the future, clothes will look shit. |
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I'm afraid sci fi film are to me what kryptonite is to superman. same goes for terry pratchett and all that keek. I'm sure this anno will make me very popular wth you all. shalom. |
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<contracts> you need some Lama in your life. Possibly in door stop form (he suggested in an attempt to get things back on track). |
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//Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy noted just how annoying doorways that talked to you would be// |
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yes but this wouldn't be an annoying robot, this would be the soothing and enlightening words of the wee baldy guy himself. |
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It's the battery-powered part I have trouble with. Somehow a battery-powered (or otherwise electric) Dalai Lama rubs me the wrong way. I need to think about that. |
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solar ok with you. or how about bio gas!!. nah your right, stick with solar. |
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The technology and platform for this pretty much exist in the form of plastic, battery operated dogs, cats, pigs, etc. that can be set near doorways to make their appropriate noise when someone passes through. |
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Solar, yes, surely it would be powered by light. |
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i think it should be rigged to automatic doors, so that you must contemplate the koan for a moment before entering. (+) |
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<contracts> - a two headed dalai lama? - would that be a dalai push-me-pull-you? |
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//would that be a dalai push-me-pull-you?// |
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sounds a bit violent for a buddhist. |
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I once saw a pope cuckoo clock, where he popped out and said "Urbi et Orbi" I also oce saw a Padre Pio beer bottle opener. So Catholic Tack is baked, centuries ago. Although I would like to see the door stop market expanded to include other world religious leaders. Perhaps even an Ian paisley door stop, 'NEVER!!!!' He's tried to stop everything else. |
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did you know that for Buddhists the head is the most sacred place in the cosmos? This is a funny but very disrespectul idea :-) |
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disrespectful!?! moi? ok maybe just a little, but think of the calming influence the little man could have on your home. |
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When I went to Lourdes, the streets were full of gaudy quasi-religeous tack. My favourite was the BVM and St Bernadette flick knife. |
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I've seen a lourdes holy water super soaker. |
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Sounds incredibly irritating but I'll give it a + if you promise that you'll only sell it to tourists. |
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come on Doc you cant call Mr Lama irritating. or you'll come back as a rat. [yes, i know it doesn't work that way... or does it] |
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Remeber 'Big Mouth Billy Bass'? Sorry, gotta bone this one. |
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man how can you compare a singing fish to a guru in spiritual enlightenment. I think this 'the door stop' should be a high grade product with hundreds of sayings prerecorded and randomised and with high quality playback. oh, and be a door stop too, of course. |
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Sorry, don't mean to diss the Lama and I wouldn't compare his profundity to that of the fish, or even to Homer Simpson's Educational Talking Astrolabe, but encapsulating his wisdom in a doorstop is a little like seeing a beautiful sunset, photographing it and mounting it in a 6x4 clip frame next to your toilet. I mean... 'door stop'? |
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yes but it did match the trimble and hume bookends. they had to take the battery's out of the Hume bookend, he insisted on talking to EVERYBODY. the trimble one bizzarely was pushed off the shelf whilst noone was looking...hmmm. |
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nobody understands NI politics then? |
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is it because you cant tell which idiots which? coz we struggle with that too most of the time. |
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//If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.//
The times in my life I was least happy I wanted some combination of protection, peace, and food. Some twit meditating compassion at me would have given me none of those things. |
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//Some twit meditating compassion at me would have given me
none of those things.// |
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My experience suggests otherwise. YMMV. |
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<Notes that [pert] is easily satisfied and has a distorted "Heirarchy of needs", thus is ripe for exploitation/> |
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The one-L lama, he's a priest
The two-L llama, that's a beast
But I will bet a silk pyjama
There isn't any three-L lllama. |
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There are already Buddha door stops but they don't say "If anything is worth doing, do it with your whole heart". Not forgetting your body and mind. In this case, the body being the one on the line. |
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How about a Yoda doorstop, replete with a database of Yoda-isms ? |
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Too many Molière comedies about disputed inheritances, [8th]? |
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Precisely; we shall persuade you to imagine that you are unwell, indeed an invalid, and entice you into paying for some "psychic massage" ... |
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I'm not sure enticement is really your strong suit, but give it your
best shot. |
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