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DogMop
Fido! You missed a spot! | |
Roland chuckled quietly to himself as he fed Fido the piece of steak. Little did the dog know the food was laced with worm eggs. Soon it would be rubbing its shaggy arse on the floor like crazy.
The treat swallowed, the trained dog submitted to having the lambswool diaper fitted to its rear end.
Roland's
hardwood floor would soon be sparkling clean.
The humane version
Doggy_20Lick_20Meat_20Spray_20Mop
For anyone who isn't a nasty piece of work like Roland. If I ever meet him... [wagster, Jan 11 2009]
Flying DogMop.
http://www.funnydog...tures/crazy_dog.jpg
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jan 12 2009]
[link]
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I'm sure you could just train a dog to rub the floor and it would happily do it if rewarded. |
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I'm sure you could, but this obviates all of that training.
I don't mind being fishboned (apart from the fact I want negative voting removed entirely from the site) but I really don't like people boning an idea without justification of their actions. It's mean and cowardly and ought to be beneath them. |
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I'm sad to have to admit that this idea came directly from the evil mind of UnaMomma and not from my abnormally fertile imagination. |
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He he. Another potential means to the same end.
That IMHO is less mean. Use a stool softner.
Poochs need a good firm crap to clean out an anal
gland. If it goes uncleaned it is itchy for the dear
house pet. |
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Also now that consumables, like doggie mop
pants, are going smart. Program a lil embedded
app to have the buffer-k9-wear reward the pooch
( scratch its ass ) for its' scooch in areas that are
more in need of a polish. Certainly an upgrade,
but not unreasonably so. |
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Rolands' lil buttox cleaning pet was so satisfied
from his treat that as Roland slept Fido crept.
Crept up onto the bed. Fido had only devoted
love in his kiss of thanks, upon Rolands' face ..
Soon after that, Rolands was scratching his\her
head ,
Why does my arse tickle me so? |
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Roland is a nasty bastard. I have no idea what what relationship he bears to me... just that it can't be anything good. |
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This is a *terrible* idea. What kind of planet are you on? |
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My house has mainly carpet flooring - what use is a bloody lambswool diaper?! I'm bitterly disappointed with your flagrant 'floorist' prejudices. |
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Most of the time when a dog rubs its arse on the floor its due to an impacted scent gland, not worms. |
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I left a bone for the poor doggie... |
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Mrs. B is a tuff un, too, I think. |
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I laughed, but then I boned. Just too graphic for me. |
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This is a *terrible* idea. What kind of planet are you on? // |
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I didn't think of the fucking thing. I just recorded the wishes of Mrs UB. |
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OK, I'll come clean. If an idea involves Roland then it's pretty much a given that she thought of it. There, I've said it. I've finally admitted the inspiration for Roland. Ya happy now? |
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Maybe if the over worked Mrs UnaBubba,
UnaMomma, had some more help about the
place...... ..... ? |
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True, we all know the autoboner has no fear. |
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Who says the dog is suffering? Everyone enjoys a good scratch... especially dogs. I think you're taking your PC leanings a bit too far. |
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How would the wriggly treat-supplement be
packaged? Assuming this is an item I'd buy in
either the pet isle or the household-cleaning isle
of my local market. They do have an icebox, next
to the block-ice freezer, that earthworms are sold
out of. Already in place. My intuition is giving me
a sense that a 'host' maybe required to act as a
preservative. A gerbil? |
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If several bleeding heart activists, feel for the
mans-best-friend. I can understand that. So,
howbout lace the bird feeder with the wormy
maggotish ticklers. The cat will eat the slowed
down bird. And every dog loves, loves,loves, to
eat cat poo! In the end my hands are left clean.
And Fido can be again put to good use helping
out. BTW , dogs need a job that they can do. It's
true! |
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I rather preferred Blackstones' dissent. |
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I have a sneeky suspicion you are not enjoying
this Idea nearly as much as you can. Let go your
position for but a moment. |
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And anyway, who am I or you to judge if any at
all, North Queenslander dogs,exist that don't
already have worms! |
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It just seemed to be more palatable . Palatable to
infest a hamster, a bird, a cat, and a finally the
dog! |
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BTW, all of which are property owned by Rolands.
A factor of which you seem to be disregarding!
Hereby trespassing upon, against the.. umm, the
rightful owners . The property rights are really
non of your affair. As an observer to have an
opinion, sure. But to remove the working dogs'
motivating force. To be a helpfull member of the
pack, that is important to Fido! To tear away his
lambswool panties! That
will certainly harm this Rolands freewill. Freewill to
do with, what he\she may ever so want. And to
not suffer your trespass. |
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To
suffer damages caused directly from you. Knowing
you are harming their beloved pet! Is just uncool |
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Also, What about the worms. Aren't worms
people too? The worms never get fair
representation from narrow minded pre-
programmed, fallow the crowd ... ummm, regular
Good
people! |
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I'll assume\infer from your vagueness, you
understand and do not disagree!.. Bravo! |
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I see you edit added after my reference to
vagueness. |
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I ask you a question. If, for the sake of my question at least, Karma does exist, then is it any
worse Karma to be doing something with ill
intent, albiet in reality it is not so bad as the
emotional harmful bad-Karmas intent was? |
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Just because Rolands was having a bit of an evil
Scientist moment. A knowing snicker. That does
not mean anything in practice! The crazy mood
swings of Roland and a personal aside, a moment
to be sinister, To enjoy in a moment of
imaginational callused fun. that don't add up to no
cruelty no matter how high-n-mighty you wanna
slice it. |
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My dogs wag their tails enthusiastically whenever anyone moves, opens something or makes eye contact. Invent a polishing attachment for that behaviour. |
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Or perhaps you could just use grass scent to encourage rolling and thrashing about. |
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Catnip makes our cats roll around the floor. I now realise I could use this for polishing. The odd spot of drool could be a problem. |
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