Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'

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Elephant (was Cow) Toilets
Outdoor lavatories for Elephants (was cows)
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Same idea as before (see below), only using elephants because they probably could be trained to use outdoor latrines.

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I wonder if cows could be trained to use outdoor latrines. That way you could gather lots of manure efficiently during the time the cows aren't in the shed. If all this manure was then fed into a digester you could produce a lot more methane. You wouldn't pollute the countryside so much with all those nasty nitrates, either. Maybe they could be trained to use the latrines by having an electroshock collar that detects how close they are to the latrine and the acceptable radius around a latrine in which defecation is allowed is gradually reduced until the cow ends up using the latrine. A defecation sensor would have to be developed. Perhaps with so much methane being produced the primary function of cows would change from one of food and drink production to one of energy production. I see this also working with goats with the advantage that goats might be able to process a wider variety of vegetation.


humanzee, Sep 10 2003

Cow Toilet Seat http://www.tiger.nl...ttingen/2533101.htm
[Amos Kito, Oct 17 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

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       I have my suspicious about just how trainable a cow might be. They strike me as particularly stupid animals. And I don't know how much control you would have over your bowels when your diet is almost exclusively grass-based.

custardlove, Sep 10 2003
  

       Similarly, training geese to use latrines would save many a golf course.

phundug, Sep 10 2003
  

       //I wonder if cows could be trained to use outdoor latrines. //   

       No.

waugsqueke, Sep 10 2003
  

       Cowmodes?   

       Moo Loo?

wombat, Sep 10 2003
  

       Kung Pao Dung Cow?   

       Peeking Duke?

wombat, Sep 10 2003
  

       cow do have a toilet and are trained to use it. It's called a gutter in a barn. If you were a farmer, I'd call you stupid, if you were a city person, I'd call you ignoraint

dickity, Sep 10 2003
  

       If you're a hot redhead you can call me anytime.

DeathNinja, Sep 10 2003
  

       <hot redhead> Hey there, Anytime. *wink* </hr>   

       No, seriously, shocking cows when they are trying to take a dump is not really what the environment needs right now.   

       And why IS this in food:milk? Shouldn't it be under Product: Energy: Methane or something?

k_sra, Sep 10 2003
  

       k_sra, cook him a square meal and he is putty in your hands :)

po, Sep 10 2003
  

       [custardlove]: A cow's ass is grass.

Eugene, Sep 10 2003
  

       Some cows can be trained. We had a pet bullock when I was a kid. His name was Moses. We found him, orphaned as a calf, in the reeds on the bank of the spring behind the house. He would come when called; sidle up to the fence so we could climb on, to ride him; find carrots we hid for him, fetch a tennis ball... etc.

UnaBubba, Sep 11 2003
  

       My, what a touching story! The past tense is noted though, how did he end up tasting?

RoboBust, Sep 11 2003
  

       He died of old age, at 22. My uncle called, as I had long left the cattle station, and told me, "Moses died during the night." I was pretty upset.   

       My most memorable moment was the day he climbed the stairs into the main kitchen (there were three kitchens in the house) and polished off 4 dozen scones my grandmother had cooked for afternoon tea. We were expecting a dozen or so guests.   

       She came into the room, and found him snuffling up the last few crumbs. An 800lb ox, slipping and sliding around on a shiny, waxed floor, finally leaving a bucketful of digested grass on the floor as he made his escape.   

       He was banned from the houseyard, from that day.

UnaBubba, Sep 11 2003
  

       Have to agree with dickity - not needed for stabled cows, defeats the purpose of free range cattle.   

       On a fun note, you can housebreak horses, donkeys, and goats. They are more careful with where they urinate than with where they poo, though.   

       And why the heck don't we process farm waste for energy, anyhow? The closest I've heard is of a zoo that sells fertilizer for funding. It's called ZooDoo.

SullenGrrl, Nov 22 2003
  

       I have this memory, sullengrill that zoos sell big cat droppings for your garden to deter moggies. honestly!

po, Nov 22 2003
  

       How about elephants?

humanzee, Jan 11 2007
  
      
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