h a l f b a k e r yI CAN HAZ CROISSANTZ?
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Using lightweight polymers and a computerised pumping system it should be possible to reproduce the lie of any golf green on any major golf course in the world.
Tired executives could shed their stress (along with their transparent suits) and head out to the nearest course, first laying out the
folding version of the notorious Road Hole at St Andrew's, or the 18th at Augusta, Georgia.
The ultimate Yuppie toy, at just $350,000 for the dual processor CAD-controlled version.
Folds up to fit in a pocket on your laptop case.
The "Minature Golf" version of this idea...
http://www.halfbake...romagnet_20Mattress
Just play golf on your Electromagnet Mattress [hippo, Feb 28 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]
Pin Clock
http://www.iwantone...LOPIN&category=life
Just so you have some idea what the hell I'm talking about. [etherman, Nov 24 2004]
[link]
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Bravo. This would be cool even if it wasn't portable and they had to go down to a local franchise. |
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Thanks Bris. This would work as a franchise business. |
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TODAY ONLY ! The Blue to Green 5th at Laguna Quays! TODAY ONLY ! |
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I wonder if inflatable is precise enough to model greens though . . . all the subtlety. |
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I'm sure there's a way to do it, Bris. You would need the surface to be addressable down to distances of say 1 cm (0.4in). Then the subtleties would work themselves out fairly well. Getting texture on the surface would also be a challenge. |
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In a fixed location you could build an hydraulically actuated floor. That would be ideal, as it would be load-bearing. |
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There exist coin-operating putting games that operate on this exact principle, though they're mechanically very limitted. The player always shoots at the holes from the same distance and on each shot either makes a hole in one or doesn't; either way the player proceeds to the next hole after receiving either one stroke (if the shot went in) or three (if not). |
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Do they operate controllable surfaces over an acre of immaculately manicured green? Can you dial up the spatial co-ordinates for any green on any major course in the world? I have no idea of the level of sophistication of such follies in the US. |
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As I have never played golf, I'd probably be fairly bad at it. Therefore when putting, I'd like the hydraulically actuated floor to continuously and dynamically alter the contours of the surface between me and the hole so that my ball ends up in the hole. |
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There's no challenge in that. Starting with a Hickory Shafted set (which I still possess) I've played at least 1 round a week for 25 of my 41.5 years - with intermittent off years in between - such as this golfless 2 years I'm in now. Every course, every fairway, every green is different. In fact, depending on where the sun is determines which way the very short grass on the green reaches for sunlight - which in turn affects roll of the ball ever so slightly. I'd love to be able to play Augusta. Enjoy your flaky pastry at the 19th hole, Bub. |
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There is the problems of the 'hardness' I suppose of the green. The green could be perfectly flat and featureless, but if it were on the sand of the Old Course, its quite likely to be hard and fast. Go two miles inland to the Duke's course and the clay soil will make it soft and slow. The same shot, be it approach or putt, will not work on both, even if the topography is identical. So you would have to include some way of adding a degree of 'give' to the surface. And of course (since you brought up St. Andrews Mr. Bubba), what adds to the difficulty of many of the holes there is the fact the green/fairway demarcation is not as clean cut as it would be at Augusta for example (note how many golfers putt for ten yards off the green at the Old). To retain authenticity, you'd have to include a good 50 yards of the fairway in the Folding Green. Which might mean you need a very big laptop bag. |
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[mcscotland] You're right - the local franchise, non-portable version should be an entire hole. You'd need sophisticated polymer's indeed to reproduce not just grass but paths (The Roadhole at St Andrews), Bunkers, Shrubbery (Those Azaleas round the back of the 12th at Augusta) and Water (Ray's Creek, the 17th at Sawgrass etc). As you say, even the green idea would need expansion - you couldn't have the 18th at St Andrew's without the valley of SIN, even though it's off the green
Still UB I love the idea. Can I rent one for the ay rather than buying?? |
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This is reportedly about 1/8 baked at a golf course in Texas. The landscaping is all made of real earth and grass and sand and water, but each hole is meticulously sculpted to reproduce the topography of one of the 18 most lusted-after holes among the world's most exclusive courses. I've always thought that was a fantastic idea, and would seem to me to offer enormous profit potential. |
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I don't think the green would have to be untextured. Thread artificial blades of grass through the green. Dropping the level of the green would make the grass longer, raising the green would make the grass shorter. Better yet, put a second adjustable surface with the grass blades under the adjustable surface that acts as the green so you can modify both independently of the other. |
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The cup can be anywhere since all we have to do is drop a circular section of the green to create it. |
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I'm beginning to love this idea. I can't see how it could be portable anymore (The name was only a pun anyway) but the franchised version would probably work, provided you had a large enough population of Japanese golf fanatics at your disposal. |
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Extra features (remember the Carnoustie open when no one finished under par for the first day? And Woods went 35 holes without a birdie?) - huge fans, salt water sprinklers and refrigeration units.
I think that is officially the end of the laptop bag idea. |
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. . . besides, you can't get a windmill into the laptop bag. |
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Exactly Mr. Sealy, hence my Carnoustie reference. It is *always* funny watching golfers reared on the fake perfection of courses like Augusta, Pebble Beach, or Royal Montreal try to skelp a ball into a force nine gale at Troon or wherever. Its an outdoor game, it should have genuine outdoor conditions. |
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Phoenix: you're on to something there |
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With the grass length? The difference between 'fast' and 'slow' is about a millimetre of grass length. |
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The way I see this is that it wouldn't be inflatable but be like one of those pin rack things where you can put your face in it and it makes the impression on the other side. the entire green is made out of one of these and then covered by a sheet of flexible artificial turf. thousands on little servo's below power the pins into achieving the correct contours. |
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I think Magneto used one of these in X Men 2 to show maps and city scapes. |
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<link> might make more sense of my nonsense...maybe not. |
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I think I'd better rent Xmen2 |
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awww you no the thing I'm ttalking about. It's a square frame with a squillion metal pins in it that can slide back and forwards. You put them on top of something and the sculpt an exact impressio of it on the other side. no? darnit cant find a good link aaaargghh!! |
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no, I understand, I think everyone has seen them. |
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