Global Positioning Schnozzle

Jim never has to ask for directions. He wears his Global Positioning Schnozzle everywhere. He likes its look and feel.

"Yes, it's a beaut! It reminds me of Aristotle Onassis' glasses minus the lenses and frame that goes over them. On the wide sides are a small, map screen and tiny keys for entering coordinates. Extending down the bridge of the nose is a pointer with an arrow tip. It telescopes longer when it's farther to the destination, and it glows at night - perfect for night hiking! It's easy to check by looking downward while crossing my eyes."

"Of course I don't have to look too often, since the GP Schnozzle can give a slightly painful nudge to one or the other side of the nose to point my head in the right direction. Sometimes it's easier to keep my head turned sideways when making a detour around a mountain."

Jim and Jill decide to meet in the big city. No problem, Jill also has a Global Positioning Schnozzle. The two schnozzles link up with minimal input, and the trendy pair soon find each other. Unencumbered by compasses or electronic gadgets, their hands are free to hold each other as they stroll down the avenue, nose-to-nose.