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Global ThermoMethane War

A humorous adaptation of a classic PC game
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While grinding away at work the other day I had a bad case of the burrito farts from the Taco Bell food I had earlier in the day and the stench caused an epiphany! First part involves an old PC game called "Global Thermonuclear War". This was a text-based game where you played either the role of the US or Russia during the Cold War and you basically take turns firing ICBMs at a list of the other's cities. The dual goal being to cause the most fatalities and eliminate all of the other country's major cities.

The adaptation I came up with would be a team based game with each player representing a city. The capital cities pick the targets until they are eliminated and then the next highest populated "city" assumes the role.

NOW, for the interesting part, both countries have their WMD stockpile(an air tank that they fill with their own methane) and all the cities attempt to manufacture as many "bombs" as they can(farts) during play. Running from the air tanks are air hoses that lead to respirator masks which each player on the opposite team wears. The capital cities have 30-secs to decide a city and if your city is selected, the other team "bombs" you by giving you a dose of their gas. If you resist then the attack fails, if you don't your city is eliminated and the other team is awarded the number of casulties that your city represents. The last country standing or the one with the most casulties once the stockpiles run out is the winner.

Yeah, I know, it sounds like something only a bunch of crazy whiteboys would attempt, but I fit in the category so of course I think it's a good idea
scott_r_uber, Oct 30 2005

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       This idea stinks! Bun!
Dub, Oct 30 2005
  

       yeah, I suppose it would stink [Dub]
scott_r_uber, Nov 02 2005
  

       New Zealand and Australia, with our vast methane generation capacity, would win despite our lack of 'crazy whiteboys', .. 'bro.
ConsulFlaminicus, Nov 02 2005
  

       [Thzzzzpt!]
DrCurry, Nov 02 2005
  

       erm, nice rant [UnaBubba] but uh.. the only mention of methane was in the title, which now seems like a failed attempt to be catchy. I made sure to clearly state that the bombs were farts, not methane, and thanks for bringing to mind the fact that when we smell a fart we really have our noses packed with feces.
scott_r_uber, Nov 04 2005
  

       suggest calling it Fart-astic ! +
xenzag, Nov 04 2005
  

       And if you really want to attack your enemy with the smell then simply diluting the waste into a pudding like consistency and then shooting it out through a sprayer would have a more effective effect.
Jscotty, Nov 04 2005
  

       Feh, whatever you call it [Unabubba], there still wasn't any mention of methane in the idea.

[Jscotty], we want to stink the other players until they quit, not die or fall over and have siezures!

I'm still surprised that no one has MFD'ed this for gross-out humor
scott_r_uber, Nov 12 2005
  


 

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