Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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I like this idea, only I think it should be run by the government.

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Gubstopper

grinds teeth and shuts up noisy children
  (+5, -1)
(+5, -1)
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I remember a sweet we used to get when we were children called a Gobstopper. It was a large hard ball, which filled the mouth, but gradually reduced in size as you sucked on its sugary substance (now you why my teeth are 80% amalgam fillings)

The idea of the newest version of this evil item of confectionary, is that instead of reducing in size, it actually gets larger. (but only for about half an hour, then it gets smaller) It does this because of its very tasty but harmless chemical coating, which swells up in contact with an enzyme contained in human saliva.

The net effect of this is, that once it swells to its limit, it cannot be take out, as it more or less fills the mouth of an average child. This results in preventing the otherwise noisy child from engaging in further conversation. ie their gub has been stopped.

Gubstopper is also on the end of a stick, so that a creative child can swivel the stick around using their tongue, and point to things, instead of chattering incessantly.

Delux version has a length of chain attached to end of stick, so that mumbling child can be led around on a leash.

xenzag, May 23 2012

gobstopper http://mrripplinger...ing-gobstopper.html
ha - they still make them! [xenzag, May 23 2012]

Shut your gob http://www.dictionaryslang.com/Gob
pronounced as "shut yer gub" where I live. [xenzag, May 23 2012]

[link]






       This is an idea entirely unlacking in merit.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 23 2012
  

       I suppose some sort of starch ingredient may have this effect when exposed to water
EdwinBakery, May 23 2012
  

       This sounds like an 8th idea. Are sure you aren't him in disguise?
blissmiss, May 23 2012
  

       Not one of ours, but we wish it were. Have a bun, but be careful, it may swell if you eat it ...   

       [+]
8th of 7, May 23 2012
  

       Sounds fine but I foresee torrents of drool pouring out.
Phrontistery, May 23 2012
  

       // This sounds like an 8th idea. Are sure you aren't him in disguise? //   

       It would have to be a very well-padded disguise.
Alterother, May 23 2012
  
      
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