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Baker Street Irregulars
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'Twas July again and the pimply hordes
Did spam and troll the 'bakery;
They drooled upon their old keyboards,
And posted crap, succulently.
"Beware the newbie troll, my son!
You know they're wet behind the ears!
Beware the _uk group, and shun
The ludicrous Pole Pants
ideas."
Jutta took her kernel source in hand;
Long time a compromise she sought.
Then sent a packet on public band,
And ruled the radio LAN as root.
And as in hackish glee he grinned,
The newbie troll, pants pole aflame,
Came whiffling through its login prompt
And burbled as it came.
Kill -9, rm -rf, and sed and sed!
The troll's account went *clunk*!
Jutta left it dead, and went to bed,
And slept peaceful as a monk.
"And hast thou slain the newbie troll?"
"He's come to harm, I kicked him off !
That ISP's security,
Wasn't really very tough."
'Twas July again and the pimply hordes
Did spam and troll the 'bakery;
They drooled upon their old keyboards,
And posted crap, succulently.
Troll HQ
http://208.234.4.70...er/src/jktech08.htm
All you'd rather you didn't know. [UnaBubba, Jul 18 2002, last modified Oct 17 2004]
[link]
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I'm left feeling very beamish. |
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Troll, troll, troll the bakery/2,
Trolling as a team.
Warily, necessarily primarily militarily,
They'll be stomped until they scream. |
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For those of you wondering, here's a troll
pointscoring list that may make some sense: |
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The new Trolling Point System for Trolls has been approved by the
Central Troll Committee for Troll Standards and Procedures. The new
TROLL POINT SYSTEM (TPS) will take effect on September 1, 1999. |
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10 points Killfile: Being Killfiled is the highest honor and the most
points a Troll can achieve. It represents complete victory and
indicates that the Troll has performed on a MASTER TROLL level. |
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9 points: Complaint to Trolls ISP: While not as good as being
killfiled, a complaint to a Trolls ISP indicates that once again the
TROLL has struck hard and deep. |
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8 points: Death Threat: Another indication of a Master Troll at Work.
The death threat is firm proof that the Troll has cut to the bone and
left his victim (the fish) floundering and gasping for air. |
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7 points: Personal Verbal Attack: A personal verbal attack on a Troll
in response to a trolling post indicates that the Troll has riled and
disturbed the fish in question. |
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6 points: Plea to Ignore Troll: A Plea from a Forum Group member to
other group regulars to ignore the Troll in question is a sure sign
that the Troll is doing his/her sport with proficiency. |
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5 points: Killfile response: When a poster who has claimed to have
KILLFILED a particular Troll, then responds to another Post by the
Troll in question, rates a solid 5 points for the Trolls ability to
snag a hypocritical fish. |
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4 points: Logical response: A person who responds to a Troll trying
to use logic and reason to rebut a Troll is worth 4 points for such
stupidity as to think a Troll cares about what they have to say. |
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3 points: 10+ individual responses: When a post by a Troll gets at
least 10 responses from 10 different individuals. |
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2 points: Positive response: If a Troll gets a positive response such
as ROFLOL: LOL: Great Post, etc. |
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1 point: Any type of response at all. |
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Thanks to St Threef, for finding this info. |
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UnaBubba: Good link. Maybe this should be in the help file somewhere ? It might help Newbies to avoid evolving into trolls. The Halfbakery personality types section has a place there as well, in my opinion. |
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Credit St3f for the link. I stand on the shoulders of giants. |
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Personally, I fly on the wings of darkness, but that's another story ... |
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UnaBubba- you picked my favourite poem, fortunately you
did a creditable job so I'll reward you with pastry. |
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I dare you to have a go at the Hunting of the Snark. |
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Geez, I did The Ryme of the Ancient Mariner, Ozymandias, The Raven, 20-30 stanzas of The Rubayat (now deleted with someone's account), and you want me to do 145 x 4 line stanzas of Carroll? |
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Maybe some other time. I don't have the time available right now, but it sounds like an interesting challenge. |
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I think UnaBubba's going to turn out to be a Boojum after all. I think I have some thimbles and forks somewhere, but all the Railway Shares have gone ... |
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