h a l f b a k e r y
Make mine a double.
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Jackie Chan O Vision...where you see everything in life as a comedy kung fu routine of death defying proportions, only for the protagonist to fall helplessly onto his crotch and hurt himself amusingly. No normal daily routine would be without an incident involving huge leaps over brick walls, defending
against multiple attackers using only a broom stick, or cue stick. And finally, your Jackie Chan O Vision spectacles would incorporate a rewind facility to view all the amusing scenes that never made the final cut, including anything where a person lip-synches badly and incidents where there was a real bloody accident.
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I used to have Bruce Lee vision but everytime I looked in the mirror I got lost in a hall of many mirrors and there were inexplicable slash marks across my chest. Jackie Chan O Vision is so much more fun. |
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Yeah, but after punching the guy in the face after climbing a moving bus which you got on by jumping off a motorcycle which you found parked under a Mitsubishi billboard, wouldn't your knuckles hurt? |
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I met Jackie Chan once, his eyes and mind were open. I never met a celeb with that much charisma either, not even Magic Johnson - which surprised me. And no, I don't fawn over anybody. |
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Ah, this idea describes my daily life - well, on my good days anyway. |
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