h a l f b a k e r y
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
or get an account
Jeremy Clarkson is a British journalist who loves cars,
especially the ultra fast, ultra petrol guzzling variety. This love
of cars is matched by a self professed hatred of
environmentalists, one of whom recently smeared his face
with a custard pie at a University presentation ceremony - no
volunteered to lick it off.
At The Jeremy Clarkson Custard Gladiators School, candidates
would learn safe, non injurious, effective methods of attacking
adversaries using a variety of harmless products, with various
scenarios set up for rehearsal purposes. Eventually sleeper
teams of expert custard pie throwing gladiators would lie
dormant in every city - ready and willing to strike without
warning when the perfect opportunity for maximum publicity
and effect presented itself.
[zen_tom, Jan 05 2006]
Biotic Baking Brigade
[po, Jan 05 2006]
||The whole point of throwing harmless items is that no special technique is needed. Because they are harmless. Better to have a school for teaching lethal techniques of pie throwing.
||oh - ok then - bricks, and other nefarious throwable
objects, disguised as custard pies - (see my Brick-nik
Hamper for the sister of this idea)
||A school for teaching the safe throwing of bricks disguised as pies?
||Anytime I throw a brick at someone, I
usually have no regard whatsoever for
||Sure, D Vine, youre not interested in THEIR safety, but how about your own? Aren't you the least bit concerned about brick blow-back? Those particles of grit that can get in your eye? Or about the hostility of your target if you do not take him down with that first brick. What if there are others traveling with the target who are angered by the brick. Some of those may carry their own bricks. This school teaches the proper way of hurling bricks and then retreating, so that you may hurl again. "Throw it from an overpass next time, boy. And keep your car running."
||//The whole point of throwing harmless items is that no special technique is needed.// [ldischler]
||Have you ever thrown a Custard Pie? It is actually quite difficult to throw them so that they land with a satisfying splat. As the pie is a disc the aerodynamics mitigate against the pie flying "filling first". A skilled pie flinger will fling the pie in a way to cause the most embarassment for the pie-ee. Sometimes you only get 1 chance to pie your victim, so you have to make it count.
||custard pie frisbee perhaps?
||Custard pie boomerang. Someone had to suggest it.