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Kraftwerk mobile phone ring

Kraftwerk should license their back catalogue for use on mobile phones
  (+25, -2)(+25, -2)(+25, -2)
(+25, -2)
  [vote for,
against]

I'm getting very annoyed with many of the mobile phone ringing tones used in the office where I work. Hearing a beautiful piece of Bach played through a tinny mobile phone speaker is pretty awful the first time and the tenth time just makes me want to throw the phone to the floor and jump up and down on it.
So, my idea is, rather than murdering otherwise rather lovely pieces of music, instead use music which was specifically written for that cheap-Casio-keyboard sound by those masters of electronic music, Kraftwerk.
Naturally, not all Kraftwerk is suitable for this - "Autobahn", for example relies on good solid base which a mobile phone would not be able to replicate, but I think some extracts, like the melody from "Radioactivity" would work very well.
hippo, Aug 14 2000

ringtones-direct http://www.ringtones-direct.com/
I checked here but they don't have any Kraftwerk [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

phunkyphones http://www.phunkyphones.com/
I checked here too [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

BBC News Story http://news6.thdo.b...5F861000/861505.stm
What have they done to our song? [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

ringtone http://www.ringtone.net/chart.html
I checked here too [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

freecomms http://www.freecomms.co.uk
Ooh. Baked. These people have Die Roboter, Electric Cafe, Neonlights, Sex Object, The Model and The Telephone Call - available for Ericsson phones. They also seem to have Wham's Wake Me Up Before You Go Go... [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 05 2004]

(?) Internet Scavenger Hunt http://www.google.c...rnet+scavenger+hunt
I liked the idea of an Internet Scavenger Hunt from [bear]'s comment. It seems that it's already been done though... Check out the Squirrel Hunt (http://netsquirrel.com/hunt/) which is top of the list of search results - The questions are pretty good. [hippo]

BBC News Story http://news.bbc.co....1329000/1329807.stm
Pete Waterman too doesn't like mobile phone renditions of popular songs... [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

BBC News Story http://news.bbc.co....1329000/1329807.stm
Pete Waterman too doesn't like mobile phone renditions of popular songs... [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Now available in Canada http://www.dialaring.com
A heaping big bunch of ringtones to amaze and dismay your co-workers with [charlotte, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 05 2004]

rigtones4all http://www.ringtone....com/menu/pop_k.htm
Site contains Nokia, midi and Ericsson Kraftwerk "The Model", "The Robots", "Tour de France". [hippo, Aug 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Ringtones 4 Phones http://www.ringtones-4-phones.co.uk
Download ring tones, logos and comedy voicemail greetings. Categories include pop, rap, rock, tv and film. [ringtones4, Jan 21 2002]

Ringtones http://www.tonebase.com
ringtones and more! [glennfoster, May 22 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Easytonez for Sagem, Ericsson and Motorola ringtones http://www.easytonez.com
Suppliers of ringtones, comedy voicemail and Picture messages For mobile phones. [glennfoster, Jun 30 2002]

Cell-phone Concert http://www.flong.com/telesymphony/
For lots and lots of cell-phones all at once [Matty, Jul 03 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Corporate Mobile Phone Solutions and Help Desk Software http://www.matrix-platinum.com
One of the best companies in the UK to supply you with Call Management Software, Cost Effective Telephone and Data Billing and auto-dialling devices. [glennfoster, Jul 25 2002]

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       Wow hippo, you scare me. This has got to be worth bonus points somewhere... Maybe we should start a halfbakery scavenger hunt of some sort.
bear, Aug 14 2000
  

       I think Hippo is trying to depose our king of the hill search engine ninja...<grin>
StarChaser, Aug 14 2000
  

       I really love this idea. Just had to say that. Cell phones that play music instead of ringing are very hard to bear, especially if you used to like the music.
mcfrank, Aug 14 2000
  

       I just wish they'd shock people or something, so they'd ANSWER them, instead of letting them ring constantly. I already know you're one of the tragically connected, now stop the damn thing already!
StarChaser, Aug 15 2000
  

       What if you took the opposite approach, and had a cell phone play proper music for its ring, rather than a lame series of beeps? It's not like cell phones don't have digital audio hardware built in!   

       (Sure, the speaker may be lame, but at least it would be a start.)
egnor, Aug 15 2000
  

       Would still be annoying, although less so without the plinky Nintendo music...
StarChaser, Aug 17 2000
  

       Hey, StarChaser! That's a really good idea! Just have two small, pointy diodes that inconspicuously poke through your clothes into your flesh (uncomfortable for the first 10 seconds, granted) connected to the battery of the phone via the belt clip, then instead of ringing and everybody in the meeting reaching for their phone, you would get a silent, unmistakble series of small jolts... mmmm... electricity...
absterge, Aug 18 2000
  

       The problem is that the people who NEED this function are the least likely to use it. They're the losers who have to show they're important by having a beeper that beeps, a cellphone that rings, instead of things that vibrate and do their jobs quietly. If nobody hears them go off, how will they know <the loser> is important?
StarChaser, Aug 19 2000
  

       [Starchaser] You could still let people know how important you are by having a phone which vibrates enough so that people notice it. Whereas normal vibrating phones just creep slowly across the table you've put them on, this phone would leap around and require lightning-fast reflexes and a firm grasp to catch.
Alternatively, have a phone which emits sound higher in pitch than humans can hear. "Hmmm, dogs are barking madly, bats are dive-bombing me, my phone must be ringing".
hippo, Aug 21 2000
  

       Beter yet, combine your cellphone with stun gun technology. Useful for self defense, and one could have the cellphone add charge to the stun gun for every unanswered ring.   

       Or following up on hippo's idea, give the cell phone vibrator some sort of homing feature so it will start searching out and attacking it's owner like a badly trained yip dog.
tenhand, Aug 25 2000
  

       I think it would be neat to get a small mechanical chime in the phone somehow. It would stand out from all the nintendo beeps and sound really classy, like you're even more important than all the other important cellphone users in the room.
koz, Aug 25 2000
  

       Ah [tehnand] - Spaniel Phone! The phone that chases you down the corridor.
hippo, Sep 07 2000
  

       Hurrah! Baked. I now have a mobile phone and it plays "Die Roboter".
hippo, Oct 11 2000
  

       This idea should get some more play. Totally functional, funny and cool.   

       If someone's got the digital "Tour de France" hook-up, let me know.
iuvare, Jan 20 2001
  

       [iuvare] - I had a trawl through various sites, but can't find it...
hippo, Mar 13 2001
  

       I like hippo's idea of making the mobile phone's vibrate function more obvious to those around you - however, given that some people seem to always set their phones to ring at the most ear splitting volume (which is the truly annoying part if you ask me) there is a danger that if somebody turned the vibrate function "up to eleven" you'd not be able to tell whether it was the mobile going off, or a small earthquake.
mark_t, Mar 13 2001
  

       Forgive my naivety, as I've never used a mobile, but if they don't have ringing-volume controls or flashing-light options, would there be a market for a flip-lid "HushBox" as a sponsored executive toy on each desk?   

       Design would permit quick grabbing, and control of sound leakage to taste.   

       An adjustable-position button in the lid would press the receive-call button to silence the subdued ring before you extract the phone from its nest.   

       Office rule : HushBox your mobile, [or are rules unacceptable in offices these days.]
rayfo, May 15 2001
  

       [rayfo] - My mobile has various 'profiles' which you can switch between: 'General', 'Meeting', 'Outdoor', 'Silent'.
The logic is that normally I want the phone to ring; If I'm in a meeting I just want it to vibrate dicreetly; If I'm outside I want it to ring extra loud, etc. It would be easy to create a new 'Office' profile which either rung softly, or even better forwarded all calls to my desk phone.
hippo, May 15 2001
  

       Hippo : Thanks. One of my grandsons told me the same thing, only less politely.
rayfo, May 15 2001
  

       "The Model" is available from various ringtone suppliers, so this is baked. I think the idea is good but I'm worried about ending up associating Kraftwerk with the misery of the ringtone-din on the 0838 from Clapham Junction, rather than the Trans-Europe Express.
Redbrickterrace, Oct 24 2001
  

       Um [RedBrickTerrace] - see links, read annotations (E.g. my 11/Oct/00 annotation).
I just added the link to the "Tour de France" ringtone for [iuvare] who asked for it in January.
hippo, Oct 24 2001
  

       Rather than change the music, change the phones. If enough consumers demand a mobile phone with a big sub woofer on it then it will be made!!   

       Sub woofers NOW!
dare99, Oct 25 2001
  

       Hippo - Sorry if I have commited some kind of serious Halfbakery faux-pas - I was just saying I've seen The Model knocking around, that's all.
Redbrickterrace, Oct 25 2001
  

       My old mobile had a composer, and I programmed in the Tubular Bells theme (aka the exorcist theme) which worked quite nicely, being all high pitched and fast already. Maybe the trick *is* to use appropriate tunes. Croissant for the idea :)
blamelewis, Jan 05 2002
  

       I think hippo got a bit obsessive in his quest for links.
NickTheGreat, Jul 03 2002
  

       BOI-BOI-BOI--BOING!!!

BOOM TSCHAK!

I love it! (+)
X2Entendre, Feb 25 2003
  

       In the U.S., a mobile phone or music-pumping company could obtain a compulsory license for a fee of eight cents per copy with no minimum (i.e. you sell fifty copies you pay four bucks), so licensing shouldn't be an issue. BTW, for awhile I had "Popcorn" on my Audiovox [manually programmed]
supercat, Feb 25 2003
  

       Do they have full-frequency ringtones yet?
snarfyguy, Feb 25 2003
  

       //Do they have full-frequency ringtones yet?//   

       My Audiovox is pretty old, so it doesn't. Actually, the real difficulty with full-frequency or polyphonic ringtones isn't in the electronics; it's in making something small produce sound effectively.   

       Getting low notes is difficult for a small transducer since producing a given sound pressure level requires moving an amount of air inversely proportional to the frequency. Thus, getting decent volume at 100Hz would require moving more air than a tiny transducer could reasonably manage.   

       Polyphony is difficult because it is very sensitive to distortion. If the sound the phone is outputting is monophonic, any distortion--no matter how bad--will only create harmonics of the fundamental frequency. Thus, it's possible to crank the volume on the ringer well beyond the point at which distortion occurs. Pumping up the volume that much with a polyphonic waveform, however, would produce a bunch of sum and difference tones that were all over the harmonic spectrum and were even more unmusical than the normal bleepy ringtones produced by common phones.
supercat, Feb 26 2003
  

       Huh. Perhaps some modern classical, then. Thanks for the info.
snarfyguy, Feb 26 2003
  

       I'm waiting for the day that someone hacks their cell phone's synth, and incorporates it into a live PA set.   

       (Somewhere on my harddrive I've got a bunch of mp3s made with the synth from a Speak and Spell.)
rapid transit, Jun 20 2003
  

       I don't think it's consumer advice. Rather than trying to make everything and anything into a ringtone, I'm suggesting restricting ringtones to music which complements the pathetic little speakers and sound chips which mobile phones have. The music would then sound as the composer intended, rather than crap.
hippo, Jun 21 2003
  

       bit of a shame but couldn't you just change the title?   

       suggest - hippo's dodgy tunes
po, Jun 21 2003
  

       I just Googled for "Kraftwerk ringtones" and got 150,000 hits. The world may be catching up with this excellent idea.
baconbrain, Aug 16 2006
  

       Yes - I think so. It's also worth remembering that this idea was born in a world before polyphonic ringtones and good mobile phone speakers (and also <grumble> that it used to have loads more + votes - lost in the great HB crash)
hippo, Aug 16 2006
  


 

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