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Krash!

car bumpers that emit the sound of a very large impact
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Krash! is an integrated device you install in your car, or commercial vehicle.

It consists of a set of sensors that fit into the bumpers which are linked to a library of the sounds of a series of prerecorded impacts involving the various cacophonies of breaking glass; buckling metal and hysterical panic stricken screaming. These are delivered via hidden amplifiers and speakers.

The consequences of installing Krash! in your vehicle is that any minor impact results in the sound of a very substantial impact being broadcast at high volume.

(This idea is a variation to Ouch Bumpers and posted because someone backed into my parked car; damaged the bumper, but drove off in my absence. Krash! would ensure that someone should take notice in these events)

xenzag, Nov 04 2011

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       // someone should take notice in these events //   

       ... thus providing the evidence for a massive and completely specious personal injury lawsuit.
8th of 7, Nov 04 2011
  

       "So, your honour, as I was reversing into the space I heard a substantial crash directly behind my car. It was as I jumped out to attend immediately to the person I heard screaming that the bus hit me." Thus concludes the case for the prosecution.   

       Crying 'Wolf!' never works out well.   

       It would also attract kids to kick your car, just to hear the sounds.
Twizz, Nov 04 2011
  

       These bumpers should also squirt fake blood and eject fake rubber legs/arms/body parts.
phundug, Nov 04 2011
  

       Afraid this would create the car alarm paradox, where nobody pays attention to them.
RayfordSteele, Nov 04 2011
  

       Could be wired to hidden solenoids which release catches, so that all of the spring-loaded body panels and wheels on your car go flying off in different directions.
pocmloc, Nov 04 2011
  

       Or you could just come up with some sort of device that sets off a really loud siren if anyone so much as sneezes in the vicinity of your car. I bet something like that would be really popular. Pretty soon you wouldn't be able to walk down the street without setting one off. In fact, after a while people would probably get so used to hearing them that they wouldn't even look up to...   

       Oh, wait, they have those already. Never mind.
Alterother, Nov 04 2011
  
      
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