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Microsoft Kinect-enabled Vehicle Side Peace Enforcement

Never have to pull the car over again for 'Joeey's on Myyy Siiide'
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Microsft Kinect has the potential to change the way we interact with our cars, (and they with us). For instance, are the kids fighting because of side encroachment? Turn on the Kinect sensor that watches where your kids body parts are, and electric shock collars or shock seats*, and you'll never hear 'well, she was on MY SIDE FIRST!' again.

*(what do you mean you don't condone electric shock seats and/or collars for proper child upbringing? Are you sure you're a parent?)

RayfordSteele, Nov 07 2011

3 Mustaphas 3 http://www.youtube....watch?v=7Qa-z73rMCM
...still like the car park joke (3:57) [not_morrison_rm, Nov 10 2011]

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       This invention will wipe out the fine art of steering with your feet while you reach into the back seat to untangle a fighting ball of siblings.
swimswim, Nov 07 2011
  

       Perhaps an alternative would be to install in the car a thin ribbon of high-pressure water (or ghee, or flaming paraffin, whatever) that is squirted down from the middle of the ceiling above the passenger seats, neatly bisecting the bench such that children are disincentivised to engage in encroachment. The partition can be removed by switching the flow off.
calum, Nov 07 2011
  

       It might be simpler just to divide the rear seat with a metal screen. Make the holes in the mesh just large enough to almost get a hand through. Then electrically charge it, so only the kid who reaches gets shocked. If you have three kids in the back seat, you need two divider screens, of course.   

       Note I'm not necessarily condoning the shock-the-kids notion. Its just that if you are going to do it, simpler is usually better. Besides, even an UNcharged screen can keep the peace, if the metal is strong enough and the mesh fine enough.
Vernon, Nov 07 2011
  

       Taser puffer-fish.
FlyingToaster, Nov 07 2011
  

       I'd rather use my Kinect to drive my car from the comfort of my living room. That way I could drive to the grocery store, log into the store's Kinect-enabled network, pilot my waldoe-armed cart around selecting my purchase items, pay electronically, use the cart to load up the car, and drive home, all without leaving the couch. And once T.G.F.J. and I make a nice little ferocious pack of little [Alterother]s, we can drive them wherever they need to go without having to bother with the backseat squabbling, because we won't even be there.   

       Microsoft Kinect: making the world lazier one outstanding technological breakthrough at a time!
Alterother, Nov 07 2011
  

       Yet another reason to not be in the car at the time.
Alterother, Nov 07 2011
  

       I love you 21, never change.
calum, Nov 07 2011
  

       "It might be simpler just to divide the children" into many pieces?
not_morrison_rm, Nov 07 2011
  

       Shocks above the next can cause paralysis.
bob, Nov 08 2011
  

       Yes, having suffered many shocks in the region above the next I can say that they are far more dangerous that shocks to the region below the previous, above the previous, and below the next.
WcW, Nov 08 2011
  

       //Yes, having suffered many shocks in the region above the next I can say that they are far more dangerous that shocks to the region below the previous, above the previous, and below the next.//   

       I'm glad we've finally cleared that one up..."Forward in all directions" should be the new HB motto
not_morrison_rm, Nov 09 2011
  

       // Forward in all directions //   

       DEFINITELY [marked-for-tagline]
Alterother, Nov 09 2011
  

       // Forward in all directions //   

       It's a 3 Mustafas 3 joke, in all honesty..   

       Anyway, my money is still on dicing the children...they'll never winge again.
not_morrison_rm, Nov 09 2011
  

       I always hated that spelling of whining for some reason.
RayfordSteele, Nov 10 2011
  

       Oh, shut up and stop complaining!
mouseposture, Nov 10 2011
  


 

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