Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Motivation and Life Guidance from Web-Enabled Screenwriters

Don't spend years on something that will be a 10-second montage in the movie of your life
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I propose an electronic device that the user carries around with them. This device records what they are doing through video, audio, and possibly other means, and transmits this information to one or more screenwriters, who sit watching the incoming data stream and analyze the likely result of the user's current action and thereby the importance of the action to the plot of the user's life. The screenwriters are sworn to secrecy and all electronic signals are encrypted to prevent embarrassment. The screenwriters enter their opinions into a computer with a certainty measure, and update previously- rendered results with increased certainty. Thus, when the user is wasting time, the device can alert him that what he is doing is unlikely to be of importance.

Thus, the device can help the user seek out the important and dramatic, with the help of screenwriters who make their living by being attuned to that sort of thing. Similarly, the device can warn the user when they are making a decision that has potentially severe consequences, so they can assess whether they are in sufficient control of their faculties to make the decision, or if the decision should be delayed until, say, the next morning. As a premium service, the screenwriters could suggest actions for you to perform that are likely to have interesting results.

sninctown, May 05 2008

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       You need help telling when you are wasting time? Well, [***BING*** ***BING*** ***BING*** ***WASTE OF TIME ALERT*** ***WASTE OF TIME ALERT***]
DrCurry, May 05 2008
  

       I think a few paragraph breaks would constituted a good return on investment.
normzone, May 05 2008
  

       I was convinced, from the title, that [beanangel] had found his shift key.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 05 2008
  

       A service like this without the micromanaging might be useful. This would essentially a detached form of counselling: observe->fictionalise rather than the more traditional counselling: converse->advise
xaviergisz, May 06 2008
  

       Screenwriters usually lead double lives as wait(er/resses) and kitchen staff, don't they? Why would I want their advice?
RayfordSteele, May 06 2008
  

       An improvement: the electronic device would transmit to one's mother, or mother's designated representative, instead of a screenwriter. Hopefully this addresses the above objections.
sninctown, Dec 18 2014
  

       Yes, but the voices in my head do all that for free, already.
FlyingToaster, Dec 18 2014
  
      
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