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Mr Average

 "We've tested this product on Roland, with no ill effects"
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Roland was between jobs, when the men came to his home. Roland was often between jobs, because people didn't really understand him.

Anyway, these guys were pretty serious. They had selected Roland from among millions of people, because he represented everyman, when it came to his product preferences, it seemed. He rented the average number of porn videos and DVDs, he ate the average number of takeaway meals, he drank the average number of store branded beers... he was average.

Now, when people bought a product, they knew that Roland had tested it for them, and it was OK for everyone to use.

The blue beer he had drunk today was pretty good, certainly better than last week's glow-in-the-dark beer. Next week he was going to do some more safety testing for the BIG automotive group, ensuring the safety restraints on their latest subcompactmicrocar was up to scratch, in multivehicular incidents, whatever they were.

The pay was hell, but everything was free, at least.

Roland was proud of his contribution to society, though he couldn't understand why the men kept calling him Joe.

—UnaBubba, May 19 2005

Asimov, not Dick http://homepage.mac...ories/Story088.html
[coprocephalous, May 19 2005]

The International Organisation for Standardisation http://www.iso.org
...might be able to help you standardise humanity. [Detly, May 19 2005]

A relative of Roland's? ISO-Fool
The lowest-common denominator approach [RayfordSteele, May 19 2005]

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       After testing a couple products, he may no longer be Mr. Average...
—Laimak, May 19 2005
   

       Everyman? The average person would be female, by a small margin.
—jutta, May 19 2005
   

       Average in every way, except for having a totally unique job.
—wagster, May 19 2005
   

       I've got a feeling there's an Asimov story along these lines, except that Joe Average is used to elect the government. He's put into a kind of purdah during the election process whilst psychologists question him.
—coprocephalous, May 19 2005
   

       Sounds more like Philip K. Dick, don't you think?
—jutta, May 19 2005
   

       I’m all for glow-in-the-dark beer, if it produces phosphorescent pee. Could be useful if you’re trapped in a tunnel with no flashlight.
—ldischler, May 19 2005
   

       So this is a focus group consisting of oney person?
—contracts, May 19 2005
   

       For all Roland knows, he is the ONLY ONE. THE MEN never tell you whether there are OTHERS. There may be, there may not. It is unlikely that Roland even cares, because he's just an AVERAGE GUY. Heck, sometimes he's even tempted to be a woman, [jutta].
—UnaBubba, May 19 2005
   


 

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