Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Online shopping with cash

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The internet is huge and full of things you can buy, but is heavily dependent on electronic bankery. This excludes those people who either don't have bank accounts or who simply prefer to deal in good old traditional plastic lard-based banknotes.

Fortunately, MaxCo. has solved this problem with its device for online shopping with cash. The product is being launched under the catchy name "Device for Online Shopping With Cash".

Simply remove the DOSWC from its easy-open package, and use the SCSI cable (included!) to connect it to your computer. Whip out your wallet, peel off a crisp tenner, and you are ready to sample the delights of internet shopping.

The DOSWC has a slot located on either the front or back (depending on which way round you have placed the unit). Once you have clicked the "Pay by DOSWC" button on the supplier's website, the small neon indicator lamp will flicker, prompting you to insert payment.

The DOSWC scans the incoming cash, reading the note's serial number and verifying that it is legal tender, and then shreds it finely. Once shredding is complete, the device transmits the serial number of the banknote to the vendor's bank, who then credit the vendor with the corresponding sum, minus a surprising handling charge.

The shreddings are stored in a removable pull-out drawer at the back (or front - see above) of the DOSWC, and can be used for a myriad of purposes too numerous to think of.

The DOSWC is available at Amazon. Alternatively, it can be purchased directly from MaxCo. using DOSWC payment.

MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 12 2018

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       This is could be done with cryptocurrency technology.   

       Simply print out a 'paper wallet' aka 'cold storage' of your favourite cryptocurrency. This is simply the public key (your wallet address / how other people send currency to you), and the private key (how you send currency).   

       After the paper wallet is scanned and shredded, the remainder from the purchase is put into a new 'paper wallet' and printed out.   

       I'm confident we'll see this in the near future.
xaviergisz, Jan 12 2018
  

       There is no need to destroy the money..... Just take the device to the bank who are the only people who can open it, and extract the money for double verification. I'm all in favour of money and analogue systems. Have some jam for your croissant.+
xenzag, Jan 13 2018
  

       //A myriad of, or just, myriad?//   

       Well, Coleridge said "Myriad myriads of lives", so go figure.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 13 2018
  

       //Go figure.// Alright; 10^8.   

       A myriad is a group of ten thousand, much as a decade is a slighty-frenchified group of ten, a triad is a not-frenchified group of three and a monad is a group of one.   

       Because they're from classical Greek, which has a definite article but not really an indefinite article, you can when using them in English season them with indefinite articles to taste, especially if you're a proper poet, like Coleridge, with one of those licences.
pertinax, Jan 13 2018
  
      
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