h a l f b a k e r yYou gonna finish that?
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Roland shook a spoonful of the white powder into a glass of water, stirring it in well. Fondly, his memory turned to his childhood and the powdered orange juice that astronauts had supposedly drunk on their way to the moon.
This one was a killer. A little salt, a little sweat, a few esthers that
tasted vaguely of urine, a few odours that may possibly have been a little yeasty and Hey Presto!, "Just like the real thing".
Teenaged boys, sad and lonely dweebs and wannabe Lotharios would snap this stuff up.
Roland had ten thousands cases of it, ready to ship as soon as the late night TV and porn mag ads and the spam campaign had done their thing.
The Chronicles Of Roland
http://www.halfbake...sion=Roland&ok=+OK+
Mostly about the sleazy critter himself. [UnaBubba, Oct 19 2006]
The real thing
http://en.wikipedia...g/wiki/Tang_(drink)
TANG, that is... also useful as a dishwasher cleaner. [UnaBubba, Oct 25 2006]
[link]
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...the astronauts were drunk on their way to the moon? That explains a lot of things. |
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Just add gelatin...
Bleugh. |
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<humming> Ain't nothing like the real thing baby. Ain't nothing like the real thing. </h> |
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Uh.... no. Something may taste good, you don't have to *drink* it! Ugh... I think I'm gonna be sick. |
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//A little salt, a little sweat, a few esthers that tasted vaguely of urine, a few odours that may possibly have been a little yeasty// |
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Is this 'friend' 'Roland' actually you [UB]? |
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What happens when you find a string....
Or when your teenage daughter keeps stealing your "magic" tang. |
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Obligatory regference to Vagina Jam. Partially baked, I'd say. |
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Damn, [GumBob] beat me to it. |
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Roland is out there, on the dark side of my moon, so to speak, [craigts]. I merely channel Roland, you might say. Roland is nothing like the me the world sees. He's in all of us. He's the part of all of us we keep hidden from the world, with the possible exception of [benfrost] (who appears to have lost an internal battle with his "roland" long ago.) |
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Roland has ideas that are... sleazy, questionable, "off" and almost certainly in bad taste and very poor practicality. |
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As for this idea; Try it with a nip of vodka. |
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UB, I gotta hand it to you: you have a real knack for showing off your Roland. |
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<tone=world weary>Years of practice, my son. <avuncular pat on the back for you> Years of practice!</t> |
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Search the site for Roland. You will find he has done some pretty disgusting things in his business career. |
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Did you see the very last one? No wonder he never came back. |
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There are currently 8 inventions in the food:genital category. Kudos. |
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Roland might have hit upon a winning combination - Poon Tang and spam. For the vegan crowd maybe you could mix in a little vinegar and make a salad dressing. Call it "Monica Vinaigrette". |
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"Strained through a blue dress." |
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possibly seasoned with smoked salt? |
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A dash of lemon juice would improve both, markedly. |
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How about a nice, hot cup of poon tea? Add a little sugar or honey and sip it by the fireplace... some things are just better hot... |
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Would you have the Ultimate Bloody Mary if you were to mix it with vodka and Clamato Juice? |
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Vodka, Celery salt, Worcestershire Sauce, Tabasco Sauce, Clamato Juice, Salt, Pepper is a Bloody Caesar. I guess this version could be the Bloody Caesarian. |
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"Just like the real thing"? What/who have you been eating, UB? |
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None of your effing business, [sleeka] ;) |
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