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PopToast

Poppy
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Ever on the lookout for new ways to exploit the fluffy explosiveness that is popcorn, MaxCo is proud to announce PopToast.

The PopToast loaf looks much like any other sliced white bread, apart from the large "PopToast!" logo on the wrapper.

However, baked into the loaf are numerable popcorn kernels. The kernels have been treated with a harmless* edible lacquer, ensuring that they remain crispy-dry even as they are mixed with the gloopy dough. The baking of the loaf is carried out below 180°C, sufficient to prevent premature popping of the kernels.

Simply place a slice of PopToast in your toaster and - Gadulka! - as the toast browns, the embedded kernels pop, leaving you with a popcorn-studded, fully 3-dimensional butter-retaining slice full of nature's goodness.

*this lacquer has been shown not to cause pituitary tumours in cephalopods.

MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 25 2011

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       //this lacquer has been shown not to cause pituitary tumours in cephalopods//
As your attorney, I recommend this is is amended to
//this lacquer has not been shown to cause pituitary tumours in cephalopods//
calum, Aug 25 2011
  

       //this lacquer has not been shown to cause pituitary tumours in cephalopods//   

       this lacquer has not been conclusively and irrevocably shown to inevitably cause pituitary tumours in all cephalopods*   

       *results may vary
AusCan531, Aug 25 2011
  

       I can see difficulty in removing the newly expanded PopToast from the toaster without electrocuting one's self. If only there was some sort of non-conducting, pasta-based cutlery developed to help people pry stuck toast from toasters.
AusCan531, Aug 25 2011
  

       //this lacquer has not been shown to cause pituitary tumours in cephalopods//

or, just to be safe:

//products other than this lacquer have been shown to cause pituitary tumours in cephalopods//
hippo, Aug 25 2011
  

       Our Tactical Foods Division did. The corn goes soggy in the dough, and goes fft rather than pop.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 25 2011
  

       There are rice cakes with popcorn flavor...
xandram, Aug 27 2011
  

       Oddly, BorgCo's Offensive Nutrition Research Unit investigated a very similar product at one time.   

       Unfortunately, the 'pop' aspect of the product was emphasised rather more than other aspects in the Requirements Specification.   

       Even now, birds avoid the former test site, and it's becoming clear that the vegetation isn't ever going to grow back, despite the new topsoil and the reseeding.
8th of 7, Aug 27 2011
  

       //this lacquer has been shown not to cause pituitary tumours in cephalopods.//   

       Oh well, back to the drawing board.   

       Did a quick web search and you're in luck. The market for popcorn laced toast is wide open. [+]
doctorremulac3, Aug 27 2011
  

       Although that is true I have had numerous breads with full kernels of various seeds lodged inside of them. This so called whole grain bread did not pop however.
rcarty, Aug 28 2011
  

       Is it possible that (a) the grains in question were not popcorn kernels and/or (b) that they had not been lovingly protected with a non-cephalopod-pituitary- tumour-causing lacquer before being mixed into the wet dough?
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 28 2011
  

       I doubt they were unpopped popcorn kernels because they were not horrendously damaging to the teeth.
rcarty, Aug 28 2011
  

       Hey, what keeps the popcorn from popping while the bread is being baked in the bread oven, even before it gets sliced and packaged for heating in a toaster?
Vernon, Aug 28 2011
  

       //what keeps the popcorn from popping while the bread is being baked //   

       I concealed the answer to this in the idea itself:   

       // The baking of the loaf is carried out below 180°C, sufficient to prevent premature popping of the kernels.//
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 29 2011
  

       Ok, I missed that (stopped reading when thought of the problem). However, a new problem: Baking almost certainly will take a longer time at only 180C. The popcorn kernels could dry out, and become useless for popping.
Vernon, Aug 29 2011
  

       Most recipes call for an oven at 180-200°C, and several sites suggest that the internal temperature of baked bread should reach about 100°C. Our proprietary non-cephalopod-pituitary- tumour- causing lacquer should prevent the kernels from drying out.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 29 2011
  
      
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