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Pullover of Secrets

knit your secrets into a pullover
  (+13, -1)(+13, -1)
(+13, -1)
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Why throw away all those shredded strands of paper, when you can weave them into a lovely pullover, by attaching a weaving machine to the outlet of your paper shredder?

The machine would consist of two main parts. The first part would gather the many individual strands as they emerged and form them into a single length, about the thickness of a heavy wool. This strand once softened, would then enter a knitting machine, modified to cope with the paper wool, and soon a warm and disposable pullover would emerge. Carefully planning the sequence of colours could ensure that no two garments were ever alike. Also possible - Blanket of secrets to hide yourself under.

Wear your secrets with a smile.

xenzag, Oct 29 2005

No secrets here http://www.atterbur...ry_AFB_8_Pin_up.jpg
[DrCurry, Oct 29 2005]

Growing wool from paper http://store1.yimg....I/ekay_1865_1087427
[DrCurry, Oct 29 2005]

[link]






       Paper may have come from rag in the first place, but I don't think it's chemically possible to get it back the other way - the strands have been broken up by the paper-making process.   

       Although see link for a weird novelty item.
DrCurry, Oct 29 2005
  

       the author did say disposable - I imagined it was a one-on / one-off!
po, Oct 29 2005
  

       Made in Halfbakaria
Made from 100% pure post-consumer lint
Do not wash
Do not dry-clean
Discard in accordance with NSA/CSS security specification 02-01
lurch, Oct 30 2005
  

       Do not remove this tag.
po, Oct 30 2005
  

       I don't envisage the paper being re-pulped (DrCurry) but woven intact into a single braid that constantly gets added to as in the manufacture of rope. You could build one for me and I'll let you know if it's what I had in mind - free pullover of my bank statements shall be your reward - and for you (po), the pullover will consist of its own knitting pattern. (Lurch) gets to unravel it and remake it as a series of coffee coasters for the bank manager.
xenzag, Oct 30 2005
  

       //Pullover of Secrets// I had a girlfriend like that for a while.
Dub, Oct 31 2005
  

       I think there would be some security concerns with this idea. How sure can you be that careful scrutinization of a secret pullover would not reveal account details or other secret shredded doc's?   

       Other than that I think it's quite a good idea. The homeless seem to get great insulation from layers of paper and cardboard so maybe a jaunty little junkmail jumper would be a great, cost effective way to help support the homeless.   

       I assume that these garments would be able to be further recycled and used again to make new clothing.   

       We could clothe and shelter every man woman and child in Africa using the thousands of tonnes of junkmail we produce each year. Surely papier mache is stronger than those mud huts they build?   

       Ohh yeah, what happens if it rains when you've got your paper clothes on? Unless we can waterproof it in someway.
Salmon Of Doubt, Oct 31 2005
  

       I missed this... Nice!
Jinbish, Aug 12 2009
  

       //We could clothe and shelter every man woman and child in Africa using the thousands of tonnes of junkmail we produce each year//
that's a post in itself.
  

       oh yeah [+]: nice one [xen]
FlyingToaster, Aug 12 2009
  

       [blissmiss]This has nothing to do with that other post.
Dub, Aug 12 2009
  
      
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