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Riot Cop This !

 You say tomaters, I say tomarters, let's call the whole thing off.
  (+2, -1)
(+2, -1) 		  [vote for,
against]

Riots seem to bring out the worst in police forces: Water cannon, tear gas, rubber bullets, truncheons, massed charges...

New on the scene is the RIOTBUSTER 6000. A multi-barrelled air cannon with a cyclic rate of fire of 6000 tomatoes per minute. Law enforcement becomes fun again !

Sweeping the streets clear of rioters and looters, the RIOTBUSTER 6000 makes the Tomatina festival of Buñol, Spain look like the Teddy Bears' Picnic.

Military versions can be loaded with apples, baseballs and 'sabot rounds', also known as avocados.

—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003

Airzooka http://www.airzooka.com/
For the minor skirmish, rather than full scale riot... [Jinbish, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Love Apples http://dictionary.r...arch?q=love%20apple
...apparently an aphrodisiac.... [lintkeeper2, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

[link]






       sp. avocados.   

       could rioting become a spectator sport?
—jonthegeologist, Dec 23 2003
   

       With water cannon, tear gas, rubber bullets, truncheons, and massed charges, I thought law enforcement already was fun...?
—DrCurry, Dec 23 2003
   

       Re: spelling of avocado/e/s. It appears I have discovered another diversion between US spelling and common usage here. My Greater Oxford tells me it's avocados, as you pointed out.   

       Oddly enough, tomato is derived from the Nahuatl word 'tomatl' yet we insert an 'e' in the plural form, as we do in the plural of potato (though it has its roots in either the Quecha language or the Taino language and probably derived from 'batata' or 'papa', or both when the Spanish applied the name 'patata').   

       However, given that 'avocado' is an Anglicised corruption of an Hispanic corruption of the original Aztec ahuacatl, we should probably follow the Nahuatl convention for plurals, making the plural ahuacatltin (most likely), or ahuacatlmeh.
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       show off. point accepted.
—jonthegeologist, Dec 23 2003
   

       Thank *you* for pointing out that local common usage is wrong. <edited>   

       Back to the idea; I think people would be less likely to take riots so seriously if there was a hail of overripe tomtaoes to enjoy.
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       Wouldn't it be ironic if the riot were caused by protesters, shouting "We demand you find a use for the european excess tomato mountain NOW"? Failing that, the cops could be sponsored by Heinz. Or both. Where's my broker's number?
—dobtabulous, Dec 23 2003
   

       There's a "European excess tomato mountain"? Who knew?
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       .. only a select elite few of the heads of the EC! (and me).
—dobtabulous, Dec 23 2003
   

       Tar guns followed by feather bombs would be equally fun to watch. Or something oily, like salad dressing.
—lintkeeper2, Dec 23 2003
   

       I've often wondered at the popularity of tomato as a food source. Now it's an international scandal. Next thing you know there'll be a recall of tomatoproof vests, following revelations that the lycopene breaks down the fibres from which they are made.
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       There are "tomatoproof vests"? Who knew?

The popularity of the tomato derives, I am quite sure, from the opportunity it affords to those highly intelligent and much sought-after members of society who regail us with interesting trivia, such as the fact that the tomato is not actually a vegetable, it is a fruit! Amazing.
—dobtabulous, Dec 23 2003
   

       Only a select elite few of the heads of Second Chance Body Armor Inc., Heinz (and me).
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       sp: regale
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       Said Mama tomato to the slowpoke tomato as she hurried into the RIOTBUSTER 6000, “C’mon, ketchup.”
—FarmerJohn, Dec 23 2003
   

       I wondered how long that would take.
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       The peanut isn't a nut - it's a bean. The pineapple is neither pine nor apple - it's a berry. As to "sought after,"... this hasn't obtained for me a job yet.
—Detly, Dec 23 2003
   

       Uh, coconut?
—FarmerJohn, Dec 23 2003
   

       See link. Tomatoes are also known as love apples, just to *toss* in some irony.
—lintkeeper2, Dec 23 2003
   

       Would tomatoes-on-the-vine act as multiple-warhead missiles or more like cluster bombs?
—dobtabulous, Dec 23 2003
   

       load them with pineapples and say they are frag grenades...
—Space-Pope, Dec 23 2003
   

       Grapeshot, fire them in the air and they come down plonk!
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       Next up; Custard Cannon.   

       Nah! Plum pudding cannon.
—UnaBubba, Dec 23 2003
   

       Whatever you want to use as the projectiles, I certainly would hate to clean up the mess afterwards.
—v0rtexx, Dec 24 2003
   

       Quote: "The peanut isn't a nut - it's a bean."   

       Actually, it's a legume, but you were close. Beans are also legumes.   

       For the really tough crowds, why not load up with jalapeno peppers or something of that nature?
—Size_Mick, Dec 24 2003
   

       I think you are referring to pepper spray... but this would be on a much larger scale using the RIOTBUSTER 6000
—v0rtexx, Dec 24 2003
   

       Oo, Oo, do eggs next! +
—sartep, Dec 24 2003
   

       I'm pretty sure we already have an Eggzooka.
—UnaBubba, Dec 24 2003
   

       hmmm. Cherry tomatoes for very small crowds.
—neilp, Dec 24 2003
   

       Toddler protests, perhaps? Five hundred two year olds have a simultaneous tantrum could be interesting.
—UnaBubba, Dec 24 2003
   

       grape shot?
—dobtabulous, Dec 24 2003
   

       Per my previous anno~
—UnaBubba, Dec 24 2003
   

       I think shards of porcelain would disperse crowds VERY effectively. Perhaps a jury rigged double barrel shotgun would serve...
—whatastrangeperson, Dec 24 2003
   

       [Size_Mick] - I tip my Pedantry Professional Courtesy Hat to you.
—Detly, Dec 30 2003
   

       Shards of porcelain... too many beans?
—UnaBubba, Dec 31 2003
   

       I knew I should've kept my spud gun.
—RayfordSteele, Dec 31 2003
   

       And the more they riot about genetically engineered fruit, the more genetically engineered fruit we'll need to produce in order to quell them. Quite brilliant!
—snarfyguy, Dec 31 2003
   
      
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