Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Not the Happy Cuddle Club.

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.

user:
pass:
register,


                                                                             

Please log in.
Before you can vote, you need to register. Please log in or create an account.

Salvage Squid

Trained Cephalopods
  (+19, -4)(+19, -4)
(+19, -4)
  [vote for,
against]

In recent years, several fishing and scientific vessels have caught a handful of examples of Giant and Collosal Squid.

In observation and dissection, they have been proved to be incredibly strong. Given the depths at which they've been caught, it's apparent that they can withstand considerable water pressures. These characteristics make them ideal for salvage.

Like other close relatives such as the octopus and squid, it's likely that they will be reasonably intelligent and enjoy learning through play.

Other squid species have been observed in the wild collaborating in hunts and communicating using colours. Salvage Squid Squads do not seem out of the question.

Summary : Train squid to find buried treasure. And save people. And boats. And other stuff, possibly.

jonthegeologist, May 20 2007

Cephalopod Intelligence http://en.wikipedia...alopod_intelligence
[jonthegeologist, May 20 2007]

Remote Control Bird http://www.theregis...controlled_pigeons/
Maybe applicable to squid. [Giblet, May 21 2007]

Squai http://www.squai.com/
for [marklar] [discontinuuity, May 21 2007]

...octopus Grigori oozes sullenly in his tank... http://www.themoder...n/zak_smith/113.htm
[calum, May 21 2007]

like summoning the Kraken... http://www.n4g.com/News-39464.aspx
[xandram, May 21 2007]

Korean octopus discovers ancient Koryo Pottery http://english.chos...6/200706050021.html
A South Korean fisherman has reportedly discovered a precious haul of ancient pottery - thanks to an octopus. [skinflaps, Jun 07 2007]

[link]






       If you wanted to, you could call them The Salvagean Squidarmy, but that might be going a bit too far. [+}
xenzag, May 20 2007
  

       They could salvage sea chilli for later.+
skinflaps, May 20 2007
  

       gawd, I had to read that three times to discover the idea.   

       <slap>   

       dear reader, jtg wants to enslave squid to find sunken treasure.
po, May 20 2007
  

       If they were smart they'd avoid humans like the plague - hey, maybe that's why they are so hard to catch.
nuclear hobo, May 20 2007
  

       what do bees get out of it?
po, May 20 2007
  

       [Bees are the only creatures I can think of where a productive relationship with humans is continually beneficial plus voluntary]   

       What about dogs? And how are bees volunteering for anything? "Please, take some more of our honey?"
nuclear hobo, May 20 2007
  

       [+] for Squid Squads. However, although these guys are fine under pressure, how do they cope with coming to the surface? Aren't they mostly caught in deep netty things, or washed up dead on beaches?
MaxwellBuchanan, May 20 2007
  

       And on the topic of animals that benefit from being enslaved, how about chickens? Sure, they aren't always happy, but in Darwinian terms they have won the game. Likewise any domesticated animal.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 20 2007
  

       This is all assuming you can train squids in the first place. It might be easier to trick them into salvaging sunken treasure by placing flashing lights or special scents on a sunken ship.
discontinuuity, May 20 2007
  

       <tries to imagine anything scarier than being being saved by collossal squid>   

       Make sure you don't lose the 'l' in 'salvage squid sqads'.   

       [MaxwellBuchanan], I've seen a news report of a giant squid being encountered alive and well, at the surface, by yachtsmen... who hid below decks until it went away.
pertinax, May 21 2007
  

       Jam some electrodes in and remote control it.   

       See link.
Giblet, May 21 2007
  

       [rasberry re-tart] the plural of squid is not squids, it's squai.
marklar, May 21 2007
  

       Really? I thought squai was a rock band (see link).
discontinuuity, May 21 2007
  

       Most cephalopods would be poisoned by the copper used in boat construction. [-]
coprocephalous, May 21 2007
  

       only 'most' huh, still scope for this to work...
jonthegeologist, May 21 2007
  

       //This is all assuming you can train squids in the first place. //
My admittedly very thin understanding of things cephalopodular is that they can be trained with relative ease to, for example, attack pretty girls on the beach and to desist said attack when offered crab. It shouldn't be too much of a stretch for a man with jonthegeologist's wherewithal and acumen to have a whole salvage team going in a short while.
calum, May 21 2007
  

       Sounds like a recipe for tiger soup.   

       First catch your incredibly strong but oh-so-rare collossal giant squid monster....
zen_tom, May 21 2007
  

       //it's squai//   

       Really? How? Why? From what language?
pertinax, May 21 2007
  

       The plural of squid is actually squid, but I've always thought that in the bakery, plurality and tensification should follow a somewhat more imaginitive path.
marklar, May 21 2007
  

       And the adjective describing something that expresses squid-like properties is squillious (the ll is pronounced a little like the ll in paella)
zen_tom, May 21 2007
  

       <curls up in shame at having failed to spot humour>
pertinax, May 21 2007
  

       He squids, they squode, those squai, it's squillious, she's squiddled, squdd this / squdd off etc. Possible sentence:   

       Sid's squillious squad of squai,
Squode to squid squdded sailor Smy.
theleopard, May 22 2007
  

       How do you train a giant squid?   

       I mean usually in circumstances with animals, you train them with positive reinfocement. What do Giant squids want? Squidy bones...
ColonelMuffins, May 22 2007
  

       They want love, attention, a comfy sofa ... nah, quick check suggests that you could reinforce positive behaviour with fish and crustaceans - their normal foodstuff.
jonthegeologist, May 22 2007
  

       Hey Jon, haven't checked into the 'bakery for a while so was glad to find you're still here and baking sweet, sweet dough. Love the idea, drop me a line if you want to commiserate over the inevitable finally happening.
Mr Phase, May 22 2007
  

       sp: "squodey" bones.
theleopard, May 22 2007
  

       What the bees do isn't voluntary, it's instinctive. We humans have found a way to provide bees with a good enough environment that they can overproduce and we get to steal the surplus. And if they decide they aren't thrilled with the situation, the bees try to up stakes and leave in a swarm, but an adept beekeeper will spot the swarming tendency and restrict their movements and alter their situation in such a way as to short circuit the swarming instinct.   

       I'm not an adept beekeeper. All my hives swarmed, so I've given up on bees.   

       I've read in Nat'l Geo that coming up from extreme ocean depths does funny things to animals that usually live there. The pressure comes off their systems and subtle but catastrophic physiological changes take place. In particular, certain fatty compounds change phase, and it's akin to having a part of the creature's body suddenly become liquid where it used to be a gelatinous solid. Some of those solids are in their brains.   

       Not saying that this would be the case with Squii, but it might explain why all the ones ever found on the surface were dead or nearly so.
elhigh, May 23 2007
  

       roll on next season [MrPhase]...
jonthegeologist, May 23 2007
  

       Are their brains developed enough for this? Well, if they can train bees to sniff out explosives, who know's what's possible.   

       If they rescue a boatload of people, and the giant squid is hungry, will you train it to eat the roudy ones first?
twitch, May 23 2007
  

       Queen bees have it pretty sweet.   

       *Half-Baked Idea*   

       Queen Bea Arthur!
ColonelMuffins, May 24 2007
  

       Cephalosalvage...inkorporated.   

       Or scuttled-fish.
Jinbish, Jun 07 2007
  
      
[annotate]
  


 

back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle