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School Zone Speed Control

Another damned speed bump idea...
 
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Around my well-appointed detached in the suburbs of Cheshire (la-de-da) we have speed bumps that are the exact width from the inside of one front tire to the inside of the other that allow a car, carefully aligned, to pass over the bump without much deceleration or jarring roof-skull interaction. The problem (as well as failing to slow drivers) is that the concentration and insane swerving required to prepare for the bump means that you'd hit any child stupid enough to cross a road while I'm around.

However, if the speed bump was extended to the length of a school zone (resembling a sausage 4-feet across and a couple of dozen feet long) the driver would be forced to slow down to an acceptable speed, and also stop him/her from overtaking in the school zone.

This type of speed bump would be much better than the others I see at the moment. Some are so huge that you can't go over them at any speed without jumping like a buckaroo, and others are so ineffective they're laughable.

Of course, the biggest bonus of this type of speed bump would be to see the looks on the faces of boy racers in ridiculous cars with ground clearance measured in millimetres. Damn you kids. Damn youuuuu!

sambwiches, Dec 26 2003

better idea, inspiration and he bloody well knows I woik at a skool! http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/unbumps
[po, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

po's idea is much better http://www.halfbake...-is-much-better.com
[sambwiches, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

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       //a sausage 4-feet across and a couple of dozen feet long//   

       That comment makes me giggle. The idea as a whole, I have to bun. As far as real-world implications, I'm not so sure about, but I prefer fantasy to despair anyway. :P
Letsbuildafort, Dec 26 2003
  

       The speed bumps don't span the road then?   

       Why not alternate them, like the tires used for foot exercises in football. That way, you'd either have to swerve like crazy to avoid them (thus slowing you down) or slow down and take them slowly (thus slowing you down).
phoenix, Dec 26 2003
  

       speed bumps should set off a disco dance tune!   

       why am I putting this on samb's idea and not my own? madness! must add link <grin>   

       I challenge you to a bumps duel - to the half-death!
po, Dec 26 2003
  

       Not enough hot chocolate, po? I think thats your problem.
Letsbuildafort, Dec 26 2003
  

       Nah, the speed bumps are positioned parallel to the lanes, just wide enough to allow a car to drive carefully without mounting it (feel free to make your own 'mount the sausage' joke).   

       Last year I drove a 4x4 along the starting grid of the Melbourne Grand Prix. At each grid position they'd put down huge concrete bollards to stop people speeding. The fun we had swerving between them would have meant certain death for any pedestrians.
sambwiches, Dec 26 2003
  

       You'll always win a bumps duel, po. My speciality is bready snacks.
sambwiches, Dec 26 2003
  

       There ya go! ... Feel the burn, baby!
Letsbuildafort, Dec 26 2003
  

       <swigs disgusting chocolate drink>yuk </gag>   

       //po's idea is much better.com// OH NO ITS NOT!. BEHIND YOU!   

       link don't work anyway LOL
po, Dec 26 2003
  

       do you know something? - I did my paintin' dancing feet in them very shoes..   

       cough, ahem, can we move this to MY idea?
po, Dec 26 2003
  
      
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