Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Scientific Re-incarnation Chart

"In your past life you were probably 30% corn, 40% chicken and 30% cow."
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Based on what your mom ate while you were gestating, a real guess as to what you were in previous lives.

Have your mom fill out a form, send me, oh, say, a hundred bucks, and I'll let you know what life forms the matter that became you inhabited before you became a human.

It'll be a mixture of stuff unless, for instance, your mom only ate pickles. In which case you were a pickle.

doctorremulac3, Jun 30 2016

Sorry, it states right here, see, no reincarnation. https://en.wikipedi..._Bureau_Order_No._5
Sorry about your loss. [2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jun 30 2016]

A replacement for the grim reaper? http://thumb9.shutt...rtoon-345877502.jpg
Should grim reaper be capitalized. [doctorremulac3, Jul 01 2016]

Dish of the Day https://en.wikipedi...ers#Dish_of_the_Day
Ameglian Major Cow [8th of 7, Jul 02 2016]

[link]






       How can this be? China has decreed otherwise. [link]   

       It... it just can not be.   

       // your mom only ate pickles //   

       That explains Hillary Clinton...
8th of 7, Jun 30 2016
  

       I was once a bit of fertilizer. And I will be again. Good times, those.   

       <exits whistling 'Startdust'>
RayfordSteele, Jun 30 2016
  

       I have been seamlessly reincarnated as myself hundreds of times. Wow! It just happened again! And you know what, I can accurately remember what happened to me in previous lives such as, say, last Monday. It's uncanny.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 01 2016
  

       I’m a teapot!
Ian Tindale, Jul 01 2016
  

       The corollary of "you are what you eat" is "you will be what eats you".   

       I don't know enough French to know what form of "bon appétit" you would use when speaking directly to the entrée.
lurch, Jul 01 2016
  

       That's right. If I rub my crystal balls I can see what the future holds for your next life.   

       You're some kind of weird fungus, then you're a bunch of worms.   

       Unless you get buried at sea. Then you're a bunch of fish.   

       I know some people who've gotten a jump start on being a weird fungus in their current life.   

       Do you think the grim reaper should be replaced with a cartoonish looking worm licking his lips holding a knife and fork while wearing a bib? It's probably more appropriate.
doctorremulac3, Jul 01 2016
  

       // French ... you would use when speaking directly to the entrée. //   

       Sp. "french"   

       Apparently they speak fluent English <link>.
8th of 7, Jul 02 2016
  

       Trump = 55% bat guano, 35% cactus, 15% brick dust, 4% hogweed sap, 1% sardine scales, 0.01% intelligent protein
xenzag, Jul 02 2016
  

       That's a lot of Trump.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 02 2016
  

       He always gives more than 100%.
xenzag, Jul 02 2016
  
      
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