h a l f b a k e r yNumber one on the no-fly list
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Having recently endured the "joy" of camping with my children, as some twisted sort of father-children 'bonding ritual' dreamed up by the well-meaning administrators of their school, I realised there are a few things that would make the experience more "joyous", especially in a two-man tent.
Because
it was raining and windy we had to keep the tent closed up. No problem, you think, until you realise that the kids had consumed copious quantities of beans on toast for dinner, before turning in.
Invention number one: A breathing apparatus that delivers a steady stream of compressed air to the mouth and nose, all night.
Because it was raining and windy we were cold. Though dry inside, there was a very damp chill in the air. I spent most of the night with two shivering, farting kids on top of me.
Invention number two: A heated floor in the tent, with long, inflatable troughs, for bedspaces.
Because it was raining and windy we had to keep the tent closed up. This meant that vast amounts of condensation built up, on the inside of the roof of the tent. Every decent gust of wind precipitated a light shower of "rain", inside the tent.
Invention number three: A liner of mosquito netting, suspended just inside the surface of the tent. May also keep mosquitoes out, if it's down and the tent is left open.
[link]
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October's no good for camping, is it, [UB]? |
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Not here. We had a lot of fun otherwise, but a rainy night in a tent with 2 cold, flatulent 3 - 4 year olds is... interesting. |
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[ I spent most of the night with two shivering, farting kids on top of me] |
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I can tell you love your family :-) |
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I'd like this in a small, tube affair, maybe as a hat that unfolds into a survival shelter. |
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That's gonna be a bloody big hat, but I'm with you. |
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The most sensible part of it is the heated floor in the tent. There must surely be a way. |
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I dunno. I don't think there's *anything* you can do to make camping fun. |
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Y'see, this is precisely why they invented houses. |
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I suspect both of you are perfectly correct. |
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This is why they invented station wagons and RVs too. |
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Tents are for those strange beings who consider walking across the world with a backpack ten times heavier than them for months at a time to be fun. |
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P.S. If you cut the children open bantha-style, you can air them out to reduce the fart odor, and use them for warmth. |
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Kids sleep in the kids tent, and parents sleep in the parents tent, with the air mattress, special foods cooler and the 100ft distance to the kids tent. This is far more fun for everyone involved. |
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I told my kids that if they kept farting an alligator would think something died in the tent and come and eat us all.
I found out the next afternoon that they actually believed me even though we were probably 200 miles away from the nearest alligator. |
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The middle of the night is a terrible time to find out your sleeping bag is not appropriately rated for how cold it gets where you are, I agree. |
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//bantha-style//
<geek mode> sp. "ton-ton style" </gm> |
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