h a l f b a k e r yTrying to contain nuts.
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Run a campaign of subterfuge, advertising the benefit of edible underwear to the leaders of Iraq and Afghanistan. Whilst Saddam and members of the Taliban may sound quite puritanical to the outside world I'll betcha they're just as devious as the rest of us.
Get Readers' Digest, or some other unbelievably
persistent direct mailling organisation, to target them. Eventually they'll succumb to the temptation and order a pair of "Strawberry" flavour.
Shame we can't be there to see the happy event.
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Who do you think is more persistent, an Afghan soldier or a Readers Digest marketing campaign? |
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Croissant for the back door attack strategy. |
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is there anything that explodes when in contact with saliva? |
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So our secret weapon could otherwise be known as "Salty Pants", yes? |
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Or, when the alluring sheen of perspiration so beloved of schlock romance writers kicks in and begins to melt the 'fabric', releasing the chili oil... "Smarty Pants". |
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UB: if this happened, would you wash it off with "Panty Hose"? |
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Perhaps Osama would like a good 'stocking'? Who knows? |
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Then they would probably feel even more hatred toward perverted countries. |
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" Is there anything that explodes when in contact with saliva? " |
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Sure. Utilize the water content. Any alkali metal would do nicely for a trigger. Pure magnesium for instance. |
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Perhaps a hallucinogenic would be more fun. Get 'em addicted to PCP. |
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Magnesium? That'd be pretty tame. I 'm not even sure it would react with saliva. Now, rubidium or cesium on the other hand . . . |
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Or metallic sodium... "Abdul, I curse the day I married your sister." |
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