h a l f b a k e r y
Number one on the no-fly list
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Wife: "Honey, how do I look tonight?"
Husband: "You look fine, dear."
Wife: "No, that is an incorrect response. - the card says the 'Proper Response' is: 'Wow! You look amazing in that dress!' ... No score for that one...
Try again."
This helpful aid can improve those 'hard to recover
from' painfilled relationship tests.
The cards coach husbands and boyfriends with answers to sticky questions like, "Do you really love me?" "What do you love about me?" "What are you thinking about?" "Am I fat?" "Are we busy this weekend? "Do you really want to watch the game right now?"
and for the wives and girlfriends:"Do you mind if I watch the game tonight?" "What is there to eat around here?" "Have you seen the remote?" How much did THAT cost?
From sticky questions to peaceful companionship ... a timely relationship building tool!
Annotation:
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You look won-der-ful to-night
Yes, let's have Sex now
Sex
Sex
Yes, I mean, No, let's have Sex
Yes, having Sex
Yes, unless you're proposing Sex |
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Yes, your arse does look big in that, but at least it draws some attention away from your face. |
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Some humdingers that I have received as responses to questions which clearly, CLEARLY have set answers. |
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Q: Do these shoes go with my outfit?
A:"Don't worry about that, everyone will be looking at your tits" |
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Q: Can I go out like this? (going to dimly lit nightclub
A:"You look better in the dark anyway" |
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Q:I'll miss you. Will you miss me?
A:" Actually I'm glad you're not coming with me" |
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Q:Want to see my new undies/stockings combo?
A:"No thanks, I'm going to play darts" |
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Are the cards themselves sticky or just the situation? |
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If made sticky, we could get our message across by slapping the appropriate card onto the forehead of repeat offenders. |
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What's the answer to the shoes/outfit one? |
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I think a leash is more like it. Come on this system kind of promotes lying to your partner. The old fashion way is to live and learn. |
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