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The Help File
Everything you ever wanted to know about B/2 and were too stupid to ask. | |
I don't know whether this is appropriate, but there has been a lot of pertinent prose written about what does, and doesn't, constitute good halfbaking.
It seems to me that there's an angst-ridden newbie posting a bit of a bleat about his or her treatment at the hands of older 'bakers here, every
week.
Rather than refer them to the REAL Help File (which doesn't have a chatty, conversational style about it), I thought it may be beneficial to pull together some of the annotations which best explain the halfbakery and its machinations in one place.
I'll copy a few annotations which I recall. If anyone else remembers or finds something useful they might like to add it.
If this concept sucks... then I'll put it down. No sacred cows here.
[link]
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// I've never ever seen (talked to, exchanged emails with) a halfbaker who confessed worry about any aspect of their ideas who I hadn't independently thought about days earlier "what a nice writer! I hope they stay" or something to that extent. (And that includes you, lewisgirl.) |
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Maybe this has to do with the fact that if you're good at something, you are more likely to see the whole breadth of quality in the field and realize there are people better than you. If you're bad at it, you don't even notice. |
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So, it probably doesn't help with the general bitching and moaning, but when it comes to skills, the fact that you worry is a good sign that you don't have to. |
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// I've only been a member for a short while and have posted a couple of silly ideas which didn't really get anywhere but I have had responses from some of annotations which have led to debate. I've found that the best approach is either to reply to any feedback in a calm and collective manner or simply ignore it; You'll find as much positive stuff as negative and there are many times when the topic takes a surprising turn. I think that if you're not offensive in either ideas or annotations then most halfbakers will be happy whether they agree or disagree. Whatever you do don't get put off by negative remarks and keep posting because your contribution is as valid as any other baker's. |
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// I sometimes delete stuff which heads off on an obviously offtopic walkabout. I also delete ideas which are just plain dumb (I have plenty to choose from when I'm cleaning up). I also alter ideas as posted in order to appease my critics from time to time. Take a look at the evolution of 'Unwritten Rules' as a good example of this revisionism. |
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I even tried to be nice to MrT after he/she/it/they posted an idea in plain English. Alas, it was to no avail. MrT reverted to 'jibba jabba' in the annotation thread. |
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The 1/2B takes itself much more seriously than the rest of the world does, most of the time. It really is a silly place, filled with silly people with silly names and where silly ideas get most of the attention for some silly reason. |
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There is no shame in being paranoid about the things you have mentioned. Just don't let the nasty oldtimers see your fear, OK? When something truly fabulous pops up you may notice a little ::::bravo:::: or ::::applause:::: followed up by a succinct "indeed". That is as good as it gets. |
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Get over it... we are all trying to do the same. |
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// Let me explain to you how the halfbakery works. |
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If you propose an idea for something which already exists or is the subject of an earlier proposal here at 1/2B someone, usually named PeterSealy, will tell you it's Baked, which means you're too late. (If he knows you well enough you may be so fortunate as to have him tell you rudely). |
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If you propose something technical without some attempt at explanation of how the tech aspects will work someone, usually named egnor, will shoot you down in flames [sic]. |
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If you propose a pun or a cute word you just made up someone, usually named jutta, will suggest politely you take it to pseudodictionary.com (A far less interesting place in a smaller galaxy far, far way). |
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The trick is to come up with something half-baked, (impractical, probably useless and just farfetched enough that it might be possible, but why?) You will then earn the undying admiration and approbration of your peers. Maybe. |
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e.g. If this toy were to produce a highly focussed beam of some sort of electromagnetic radiation which stimulated the motor control and guilt centres of the brain it would be half-baked, though egnor might still chop you up. |
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UnaBubba, Mar 18 2001
[edit, delete] |
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...so now that you've been shown around the Bakery, we thought you'd like to know how your ideas are seen through the eyes of your fellow Halfbakers: |
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Peter wants first-dibs, egnor wants links (jutta will provide them or mark the idea for deletion), Monkfish wants you to do your homework, StarChaser doesn't think you will, waugsqueke & PotatoStew believe in Him, centauri doesn't, UnaBubba thinks it's funny, susen will tell you how it relates to her farm, afroassault would like it to explode, dsm would like you to explode, supercat will handle all gun control issues... |
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The Halfbakery is a communal database of original, fictitious inventions, edited by its users. It was created by people who like to speculate, both as a form of satire and as a form of creative expression. |
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-Jutta, introducing the HB on the About page. |
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Phoenix's Law of HalfBaked Ideas:
"The utility / cleverness / appropriateness of an idea is proportional to the age of the account; with the possible exception of my own." |
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[waugsqueke]'s Corallary: "If you have to tell people your idea is good... it's not." |
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(Not especially useful, but apropos) |
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"This site is about original inventions. If you don't have any original inventions, go and do something else. It's okay. It'll still be here when you get back. |
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You don't have to leave
(-2, +4) [vote for,
against] |
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You could, however, try to fit in a little better. Here's a rewrite of the message I posted to something written by [postseti] earlier.
I've posted it this way because you apparently don't have an email address. |
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<message>
Hi! You're new here. |
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That is obvious, because you posted a particularly puerile idea and attracted the ire of the rest of the denizens of the 1/2bakery. Most of them tried to reason with you at first, but you rather foolishly tried to defend your stupid idea in the face of mounting criticism. You then began what appears to be an orchestrated campaign of deliberate trolling, for your own amusement. |
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The older users of the forum became increasingly annoyed at your trolling and began abusing you publicly, for your misuse of the forum. This is a manifestation of peer pressure being exerted deliberately, to effect a desirable change in an individual. |
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Failure to acknowledge the written (and unwritten) rules of the forum usually results in forced removal of the offender's account privileges. This has happened many times in the past, but always for the same reason. The HELP file is a public document, for the guidance of the wise and the obeisance of fools. It is usually the first place to which new users, who start to annoy th rest of us, are directed. That is because the oldtimers get a good troll attack every 4 to 6 weeks and grow tired of repeating themselves. |
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No-one has yet requested account deletion for any of the current crop of trolls (a sign of the tolerance and patience of regular 'bakers) though it can't be long now before one of them starts a personal attack against the self-moderating efforts of other 'bakers. This action usually ends in tears. Strangely enough, there will be rejoicing and jubilation after the demise of the aforementioned troll/s. |
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Trolls have no idea how swiftly this action occurs, as the evidence is removed with the body, at the time of execution. |
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This has been a public service announcement, for your own good |
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Wow, that last one was pretty harsh. I hope s/he deserved it. |
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Here's something that I think might be useful for people about to post the Big One: |
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Think about your best friend. The really, really close one who's absolutely honest about you. Yeah, that one--the guy/gal who will say, right in your face if necessary, "That's the stupidest shit I've ever heard", or "Wow, that's a great idea". Think about saying to them "Imagine this..." and then spelling out your idea. Better yet, actually say that to them. Gauge their reaction (or, if you didn't actually say it to them, the way you think they'd react). Then, after proceeding to google, B/2 search, etc. your idea, start thinking about posting it. |
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And for the sake of the Lord Almighty, check your damn spelling. |
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Try without trying too hard. |
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Realize that no argument on the internet is worth winning. There's more honor in beating up kindergarteners. |
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Even though there are plenty of users ready to stab you right in the feelings, you have to overcome your newfound hatred and try harder next time. Don't flame back. Let the glory of your next attempt leave them in stunned silence. |
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Yay! Give us a `P'; give us an `E'... |
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