h a l f b a k e r y
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Among the pointlessly bad design aspects of life that I
prefer to be otherwise, is the default requirement for
always be in ongoing exhausting debt; and the really
unhelpful abundance of criticism from every idiot youve
never met who has a spare ten seconds without deploying
depth of thought to consider ones contribution.
The first thing cant be rectified. The second probably can.
Merely create an entire alternative Internet in which
has a cost. It wont necessarily be a monetary cost, of
but could be an effort cost, or a social process cost (i.e.,
through ritual or ceremony), or just basically inflict pain.
latter is probably easier and therefore is a good place to
start. The other fluffier options can come later.
The Internet of Things can be extended and super-setted to
become the Internet of Painful Things. A painful thing will
inflict pain on someone who criticises another with only a
unconsidered passing seconds of shallow thought with the
incorrect expectation that their criticism is accepted and
perhaps even required.
An IoT pain inflictor is a difficult thing to get most people
accept at their desks, in their houses, in the office (if they
still have a job) or on the toilet. Therefore, the best thing
would be to redirect a microwave satellite download beam
cook them. A bit. Just rotate the satellite so that the beam
footprint covers the criticiser. After a few of those, theyre
[normzone, Dec 17 2015]
||This is drafted so as to render irrelevant the distinction between constructive criticism and non-constructive criticism. The preceding is an observation with no element of judgement attached or implied.
||It took me only 7 unconsidered passing seconds of shallow thought to realized that this idea is the new way of torturing or killing a person or an animal for pleasure or revenge.
||I would welcome a revision of this idea to be a satellite which by virtue of its insight-enabling radiations cause persons who find themselves with an abundance of proverbial lemons to make them into delicious, useful and salable lemonade.
||Until strong AI happens this will merely require couching
insults in glowing terms, you surprising piece of work.
||It's not the blender companies fault you reached inside
while it was running.
||There used to be a time where internet companies were
keen on people adopting user-names that were 'real' and
reflected their real life identities - see "Nymwars" for
policies set out by Google and Facebook, who between
them account for a fair number of usernames, which (for
a short while) mandated the use of real and proper names
- I think, in order to promote more sensible internet use.
Being critical of something under your own name does
carry with it a degree of risk and potential pain that
should curtail the worst knee-jerk reactions. The opposite
side of that is that by being identifiable, you no longer
can be quite as honest as you may have been previously.
Or at least you can, but risk a degree of pain for doing so.
Thankfully, most negative statements can be expressed
thoughtfully and intelligently without exposing the poster
as an idiot, or worse, but this takes time, care and costs
the poster a little more in expended effort than a more
reactionary "Sucks!" or, as I once saw someone post on a
youtube posting of mine, "You dick!" which I still find
mildly incomprehensible (I mean, why?)
||Its worse than that sometimes it even affects me!
What I want is a life where I am
not criticised. Thats what I want, and probably the
place to start is to want that on the Internet first,
then everywhere else.
||But of no-one ever criticised you, how would you realise you were a dick, and thus moderate your behaviour accordingly?
||a] you wouldnt. b] therefore you wouldnt be. c]
who really gives a fuck what other people think you
should be doing pretty much everyone else out
there is a complete moron and if they died in a
terrible combined car accident / wardrobe fire /
choking on beetles, it really wouldnt improve or not
improve my life one electron. Im doing it correct.
Others are false, and must be ignored, or if theyre in
my way, removed.
||So you see, its not up to anyone else to criticise
anyone else is more likely incorrect. Listening to
everyone else only causes people to join a race to
the bottom of moronic slavery of mediocrity. Have
faith in oneself thats all there is.
||(by the way, yes I hate everybody else, youre all
doing it incorrectly, you should all fuck off and die).
||//if theyre in my way, removed//
||Have you considered the purchase of a plump
white cat? Also, can I wait until after Christmas to
fuck off and die? Only I'm expecting some nice
||I can't really make the 26th either, and I'm meant
to be driving on the 27th. I could probably make
new year's eve 2077 though.
||In any event, banning criticism is a good idea. It
could be better, of course.
||28th okay for you? In any event, by infuriating
ourselves, we commoditise ourselves. You know, with
commodes. We become commodities that other
Internet peoples intrigue into paying their online fee
structures. Into. Net attain meant entertainment. Is
that all we are? The other end of a response?
||Is all this just a very long-winded way of saying
||Is it christmas? Its only just been my birthday the
other day. I suppose it must be, then. It usually is.
||Well, its rarely happy, and the christ bit can be
deleted, so that just leaves mas. But you mustnt
trust the masses, theyre incorrect.
||Could I, perhaps, recommend alcohol? I find it very
||You find drinking alcohol useful, or you find recommending it useful? There is an important difference.
||Ah. Good point. I would say "both". Both.
||Ah, the bitter aroma of distilled mas spirits. A complicated and risky vintage having pessimistic notes and fruity hints of Nietzsche's Will to Power.
||//you should all fuck off and die//
||Somebody needs a puppy for Christmas.
||I'd advise against it - there's less meat on them than
||There must be a way to actually quantify or measure
the effect that a] the whole internet is having on a
person and b] the effect that your effect on the
||In other words, the internet is basically nothing more
than graffiti. This might have different effects and
the overall effect of graffiti as a whole sets a tone.
Each individual contribution has a tactical effect. It
might be that each contribution is always below a
baseline, and above that is a generative desired
effect, but no individual can position their effort
within that band of measurement. Only as a
combined and multiplied effect might it produce a
measurably positive effect on humanity. Individual
scrawling with no accountability is usually unwanted
noise, and millions of people simultaneously doing
that wont make it wanted noise it requires a
further process step for that. A kind of banana-
shaped thing that curves the intentions, and makes it