Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Toaster + magazine

A linear or circular clip for slice of bread toaster drive
  [vote for,

The toaster envisaged has a small cog that engages with a clip containing multiple slices of bread. After the allotted time, the clip is advanced to expose more bread to the elements (*cough*) and the now browned toast starts to cool.

Once removed from the toaster, the linear clip doubles as a toast rack, and the circular clip rotates from a ferris wheel configuration to a carousel that can be placed in the middle of the table. Both clips are made from carbon fibre for low specific heat.

For breakfast simply load the amount of rounds required and press the "toast and forget" button which is the automatic toast advance mode.

bigsleep, Apr 07 2019


       Moving large device containing multiple slices of bread = complicated.
Moving single pair of toasting elements over stationary racked bread = simpler.
Since bread is fragile (soft & flexible before toasting, somewhat brittle after...) it can't be rigidly supported & moved easily. So leave the bread rack fixed, & lower, raise & advance the toasting elements instead.
neutrinos_shadow, Apr 07 2019

       ^ The magazine might replace a slice of bread on a clip. The resulting fire and pandamonium would have greater wake-up potential than mere unbuttered toast.
whatrock, Apr 08 2019

       Sometimes in hotels, you find a toast carousel, a kind of belt-feed analogue to this idea. The problem with those is it takes so long for the toast to enbrown that unless you're prepared to stand and watch the toast advancing into the red glow, and later coming out again (instead perhaps going off to load up on bacon, sausages, mushrooms, tomatoes, haggis, black pudding, and whatever passes as eggs in these places) in a breakfast scenario containing more than 5 guests, by the time you return, it is very difficult to politely gauge which bit of toast in the finished bin below the device belongs to whom.   

       A surefire strategy is to ensure the machine is perpetually loaded with more toast, thus creating a surplus and reducing chances of any "oi, that's my bit of toast" scenario that in polite society would surely blacken even the sunniest of days.
zen_tom, Apr 08 2019

       [zen] another way to solve this would be to have the bread grill conveyer belt directly behind the breakfast buffet. So, you select your bread (white, wholemeal, granary, etc.), and load it onto the conveyer. Then, you proceed along the breakfast buffet loading up on bacon, sausages, mushrooms, tomatoes, haggis, black pudding, white pudding, hash browns, baked beans and the inevitably rubbery scrambled/fried/poached eggs. As you do so, your bread keeps pace with you on the conveyer, gradually becoming entoastified. By the time you reach the end of the buffet, the bread-to-toast transformation is complete and your toast drops off the end, ideally directly onto your plate.
hippo, Apr 08 2019

       Perfection [hippo]! Plus, as people follow their toast, they are also gently guided in terms of sequence, direction and tempo through an otherwise potentially ambiguous set of proceedings.   

       A wide distribution of expectation in this regard can cause a not insignificant degree of consternation as one person decides to adopt a rotation counter to everyone else, or another who stops altogether - temporarily blocking access to the hash browns in order to allow some internal potato-based monologue to inch its way towards conclusion, whilst yet another darts in and out in a chaotically opportunistic dance betwixt stations.
zen_tom, Apr 08 2019

       Precisely - and who amongst us can tolerate such anarchy before we have breakfasted?
hippo, Apr 08 2019

       Very, very few.   

       And of these, the odds are they are on decaff, have been for a run, or are likely to have opted for the fruit, yogurt and cold-meats.
zen_tom, Apr 08 2019

       They're probably the kind of person who *talks* at breakfast too, as opposed to contemplatively chomping their way through breakfast in a monastic silence, broken only by the occasional slurp of tea.
hippo, Apr 08 2019

       I also found a conveyor belt toaster, in Thailand, which led to much theological musings.. does the toast eventually get to nirvana (I.e fully browned ) but does another bit of toast fall off the belt and get all burnt (judeo-christian stylee).
not_morrison_rm, Apr 09 2019

       I would subscribe to your new magazine, "Toaster +", because I find the editorial style of "Toaster" magazine to be a little too dry and technical. I think that the pages of "Toaster +" might contain a more diverse selection of articles.
pocmloc, Apr 09 2019

       In the next issue of Toaster+ we cover all sorts of steampunk toasters including one that raises the toast so that only 13 eighths of an inch of toast are hidden in the toaster prior to and after toasting. This 'maximum throw' toaster has a hefty spring and an external speed brake governor.
bigsleep, Apr 09 2019

       [bigs], when will you be dropping by CampTeacup Kitchen Lab to interview us about our 1940s toaster? The dog (Sherman, Sherman Geopard) and the boy (Mr. Fish) used to stand by while the toaster toasted. Magnificent spring action provided sufficient thrust that the toast was launched into the air, occasionally hitting the ceiling in the kitchen. Practical physics training for toddlers-- calculating the trajectory--to get the toast before Sherman scarfed the first piece and came for Fish's! Had we had a magazine-fed toaster, perhaps they'd've both qualified for MIT at 10 years old?!
Sgt Teacup, Apr 10 2019


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