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Toothpoo

the ultimate gentleman's grooming product
  (+6, -4)
(+6, -4)
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against]

"Take two bottles into the shower?" asked the television advert incrediuously. Not any more, no Siree bob.

Toothpoo is the ultimate "grooming, in a bottle" product. Whack some on your hair to style, brush your teeth with it, slap some to your wrinkled face to moisturise (the menthol really helps here).

There's more. Bosh some underarm for all day freshness, buff your shoes with it.

SPF 30 of course - don't want you getting sunburned.

jonthegeologist, Jun 17 2006

[link]






       How?   

       Moistro-poo? Call it toothpoo instead, that'll really get people interested...   

       [edit] good, good, carry on.
david_scothern, Jun 17 2006
  

       My teeth will never get sunburned again.   

       It's basically a lotion, with menthol, with CaCO3 for abrasion (for face and teeth). I would have told you all of that, but that would have made it a recipe and I'm not providing a recipe, only the idea.
jonthegeologist, Jun 17 2006
  

       call it tooth_o
po, Jun 17 2006
  

       tooth_o, or not tooth_o - that is the question.
normzone, Jun 17 2006
  

       Hmmm... abrasive underarm lotion...
moomintroll, Jun 18 2006
  

       Thousands of marketing gurus slaving away for decades coming up with all manner of toiletries... and all trumped by one halfbaker who thought "Why are they called toiletries?" +
ConsulFlaminicus, Jun 18 2006
  

       I thought this was the ultimate in rarity - a cross between hens' teeth and rocking-horse shit.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jun 18 2006
  

       While it's a resourceful idea, no company would ever sell it, it'd ruin their income! Chemically, that would have to be one well-thought out formula to do all the above and remain safe. No bun, but no bone either.
kuupuuluu, Jun 18 2006
  

       Comes with a 3-meter-long terry cloth buffer/applicator/warning label.
lurch, Jun 19 2006
  

       It does everything? Sounds like dentifrice artifice -- sham-paste.
nihilo, Jun 19 2006
  

       There might be a market for gross-me-out brown toothpaste...
RayfordSteele, Jun 20 2006
  

       I think a better name is "grooming poo".
xandram, Jun 20 2006
  

       //it'd ruin their income// Not if it were $78 a bottle.   

       And don't forget the instructions...   

       Use. Repeat. Repeat again. Keep repeating. All right already! Just dump the damn bottle down the drain and buy another one will you!!!
zigness, Jun 20 2006
  
      
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