h a l f b a k e r y
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Tornadomaker
Homemade tornadoes, for those special occasions. | |
Finally, Roland thought, it was finished. He had spent two days assembling the gigantic fans, hooking up ducting to a central point, with each duct aimed inward and upward at intersecting angles.
The moment had arrived. Roland flipped the master switch, setting in motion the giant fans and a heater
that poured hundreds of cubic metres of steam per second into the rotating column of air created by the fans. The heat given off by the condensing steam intensified the vortex, adding energy to it.
The column began to take shape, picking up and swirling ever higher the steam as it formed into water droplets, becoming more visible and powerful with each passing minute. It couldn't go anywhere, but it looked awfully cool. Soon it would begin to rain over the outfall area of the plume.
In the distance Roland could see the residents of a large, sprawling trailer park packing their cars and trucks with belongings and hightailing it. Shit! Soon he was going to get a visit from the law. He hadn't anticipated that.
In the meantime, Roland checked that his other inventions were carefully arrayed for maximum visibility, for when the news crews began to arrive. Tornadoes attracted TV cameras the way carrion attracted flies. Roland knew there was a market of millions likely to see his goodies, on the evening news.
Aerials of Greensburg Tornado Damage
http://www.kansas.c...0507tornadoaerials/
Showing the devastation that occurred when a large tornado struck Greensburg. [baconbrain, Jan 30 2008]
Fire Tornado and fans
http://mayhem-chaos...es/fire_tornado.jpg
At Burning Man, I think. [baconbrain, Jan 30 2008]
Artificial Tornadoes for energy
http://www.technove...ws.asp?NewsNum=1134
[MisterQED, Jan 30 2008]
The Windhexe
http://vortexdehydration.com/id35.htm
Scroll down to the second half of the page [Desidiosus, Jan 31 2008]
"Tornado In a Can"
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4723367/
[Desidiosus, Jan 31 2008]
[link]
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//...other inventions were carefully arrayed for maximum visibility, for when the news crews began to arrive.// |
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... including the House-camo covers: yours as a bar to attract newsies and the house opposite as a donut-shop to distract the police. |
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Yes, and such other delights as the Pool Table, a couple of self-powered sofas, a Cubicar and of course the People-Powered Pornhound 'Puter. |
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Didn't this used to be an idea about trailer
parks, or did I dream the whole thing? |
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Even rewritten, I'm not at all sure this would actually work. But I would like to see you (or someone else) try it!! |
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That mister must be a pretty hefty bloke. |
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Dammit, [UB], I'd savage anyone else for radically revamping an idea like this. I'm just going to repeat what I said before about tornadoes not being funny, and this time add a link to photos of Greensburg, Kansas. |
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Oh, what the hell. I'm also going to say that I've seen a fire-tornado makers much like this, so it's literally baked (link), and point out that super-saturated water vapor condensing would better duplicate a real tornado. [ ] |
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[Later] Okay, maybe you were trying to remove the concept of scaring people for fun. [ ] |
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I deliberately removed the cruelty aspect of it, making it less menacing and more fun. Roland is an insensitive clod, so he's too dim to realise that people will be scared of it... he's just after the publicity they bring. |
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All right, good motive, good move. I'm oversensitive after two nights of little sleep. |
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Seriously, the use of water vapor rather than water drops would be an improvement. I think that the force of a tornado comes from the condensation of over-saturated air. You'd have to pump tons of steam into cool air to do it. |
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I once saw vortex tubes in the mist over a river. Ten feet in front of me, about four inches in diameter, winding randomly, appearing and disappearing, barely there, once in a while. It looked like transparent snakes fading in and out of reality. |
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I added water to make it visible. Alternately, a fog of CO2 vapour would do the same thing. |
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When the vapor condenses, it forms visible droplets, and gives off heat energy. That pumps up the tornado. At least, that's my theory--I need to get it written up clearly. "A tornado is a thunderstorm in a centrifuge." |
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A tornado is like any whirlwind. A rotor of warm air begins to elevate, drawing in warm air from ground level. The heat given off by condensation is obviously a driving force in the perpetuation of that cycle. That's why cyclones / hurricanes are stronger over warm water than they are over land. |
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I took the old one down because it was becoming apparent it was upsetting some people. I'm not all bad, you know. |
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Think of how useful this would be if you pointed the air DOWN... [link] and [link] |
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The Windhexe sends jets of compressed air spiraling down a large steel funnel. As the funnel becomes more narrow at the bottom, the speed and pressure of the air increases. Combine this with the exhaust heat from the air compressors, and you have a rather hostile environment. It turns out that if you drop nearly anything down the middle of the funnel, it will be almost instantly pulverized to a fine powder. With a little imagination, the uses for this are vast, indeed. |
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Somehow I knew Roland was behind it all the time. Nice rewrite and an interesting expose' into the psychology of the bakery. |
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