h a l f b a k e r yContrary to popular belief
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In those 'must pick' situations, a transparent nose picker can be appended to your finger. While it looks like you are merely scratching your moustache or pulling your lip, a 3 inch long transparent attachment is right up your nose, clearing out any excesses.
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I think that you are lacking ambition with this one. Why stop at picking? Snipping away excess nose hair and flicking unobtrusively could also be included.
I'm sure that there is definitely funding available for this somewhere. |
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How about a transparent arse (US: ass) picker? |
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pretty good... until people see seemingly possessed, ghostly bogies floating out of your
nose and flying accross the room. Maybe include some kind of 'klingon masking device'.. |
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Reminds me of the joke my nephew came home with. Q. What do Doctors find up clean noses?
A. Fingerprints |
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Redleader's comments were the first thing that occurred to me too... solution: the transparent nosepicker could have a vacuuming device with a camouflage hose... perhaps one that attaches to sunglasses? |
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A friend of mine lost the last joint of his index finger in an accident. His sense of 'humor' is such that he cannot resist placing the truncated digit at his nostril or ear in a public place...just to see peoples' reactions. |
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Did I mention he is a PhD and widely respected in his (very complex) technical field? |
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Just do what I do pick and be proud! I like the Billy Conolly one about when you need to scratch your arse. Just shout "My ARSE is incredibly itchy - I think I'll scratch it" and everyone turns away to avoid the disgusting spectacle you are making of yourself. |
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Just the thing to pick your transparent nose. |
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A second rubber "finger" that attaches to your middle knuckle would be even better. Then you could pick your nose, but it would look like your finger was *on* your nose. |
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Something like that but larger would be good if you wanted to have sex in public, but it would look like your head was *on* her lips. |
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It's sort of like you're having sex in public (though you're not really (or at least one of you isn't)), while the public thinks you're not having sex but are just touching private parts, or something. |
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how about a remote controlled nano-nosepicker? |
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Wouldn't it be kind of like a strange magic act, boogs seeminly floating inches from your fingers right out of your nose? David Copperfield eat your heart out! |
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