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With United Airlines recent financial issues, and yesterdays near accident caused by Canandian Geese, I suggest United Airlines take on a new campaigne.
Goose-along, Goose-be-gone
Each passenger is presented two Canadian Geese, when they purchase a ticket to fly anywhere in Canada.
On arrival
in say, hmm Vancouver, the passengers disembark with their new pals, and voila. A two birds with one stone sort of solution is found.
United gets passengers and money, and the United States gets rid of the problem of too many geese near the airports.
I think.
Training geese to fly with planes
http://www.flightgl...ures/geeselarge.jpg
There's your problem [bigsleep, Jan 16 2009]
Fly United
http://www.dking-ga...AD_70FlyUnited.html
Classic Poster (slightly risque') [csea, Jan 16 2009]
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Annotation:
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Does George W. still have time to declare war on geese? |
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Not sure, but he's up to his eyeballs in goose shit, I know that! |
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Were these geese really near the airport, or just near the Hudson River? Anyway, I'm officially starting the Save The Geese campaign. I love Canada Geese and I don't want to see the whole NY population slaughtered. + |
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I don't understand phundug, love the geese and glad the people on the plane had such a wonderful escape. |
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[+] any promotion that includes complimentary geese. |
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link [rcarty] ? of course we care. |
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The Canadian goose neighbor of mine (lives here
in my pond)(erm.. his pond) is a
loud mouthed-bossy bird brain. If he were aboard
any comcial flight, he would be making those flight
attendants 'Really move their Tail' for him. And if
anyone-old, young, male, or otherwise, even looks
( takes a gander at) at Mr. McQuacks
sweetheart...well, so far I've escaped serious
injury. And I'm not even emotionally invilved with
his SO. |
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Note that the emergency landing in the Hudson River was a US Airways flight, not a United Airlines flight. |
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I wonder if any terrorist organisation has considered rearing
new-hatched geese in such a way that all their food and
warmth comes from a large circular fan which makes a loud
whining noise? |
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Saves them from having to make that long migration, too. |
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\\ terrorist organisation has considered \\ |
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If not already ... They may now. Perish the
thought!!! A Gosling's mama, the air bus. |
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//If he were aboard any comcial flight//
Sp. "comical". |
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I'm not sure that crash landing an airliner full of passengers in the middle of a river is the type of thing most people would classify as a near accident. |
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in the freezing cold and lots of river traffic. |
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what if you have sworn to never again engage in the transportation of poultry for any purpose? |
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My experiments with adaptive magnetic feild implants allows me to direct the movements of entire flocks by influencing only the Alpha goose in each V. |
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My minions of minimum destruction will soon be unleashing their payloads upon Humvee drivers across North America. |
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I appologise for any inconvieniences this may cause as the last of the bugs are worked out. |
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Not that I want to diminish the occasion, but surely, since aero engines are currently tested with 'chicken launchers' for safety before they go ner a plane, should the testing be upgraded for 'the larger bird'? |
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We have Canada Geese over her in the UK. They're common as muck in England, but when my Grandad was up in Scotland watching an osprey, the keeper at the park was quite impressed that they had 'a pair' of canada geese. |
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Nice one to the pilot, but hopefully the other geese will learn from their brethren's mistakes. |
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Professor Feinstein was summarily deported back to the US for forgetting to bring his geese to the convention. |
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It would be far more sensible to have separate planes for the geese. Geese on average are smaller than humans, so seats could be smaller and you'd get a lot more on a flight. Catering would also be simpler. |
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Given their ability to fly really high, you wouldn't have to bother too much with pressurisation and heating, either. I know the Canada Goose doesn't fly as high as the Asian Bar-Headed Goose, but they still fly pretty high when they want. |
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/I know the Canada Goose doesn't fly as high as the Asian Bar-Headed Goose/ |
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//Note that the emergency landing in the Hudson River was a US Airways flight, not a United Airlines flight.// |
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A United 767 had a double bird strike in 2007. One engine kept running, fortunately. And two years before, the same flight ran into a flock of birds and had to return. United flight 843 from Chicago to Sao Paulo--you might want to avoid it. |
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The Asian Bar-headed Goose regularly flies over the Himalayas, on migratory flights. They've been observed at altitudes in excess of 31,000 feet. Up there the atmosphere is about 25% of STP and temperatures reach as low as -60 °C ( -76°F). Tough geese. |
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No no no if you do this, there will be more geese at airports, not less. They will evolve to lose their ability to fly, grow dependent upon the airlines, demand cheap tickets and mileage compensation for all of those years that they flew themselves back and forth to South America, make a terrible mess of drug trafficking control, as well as reduce a classic Monty Python sketch on the origin of northern coconuts to the size of a swallow's onboard carryon. |
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Well, they are Canadian, after all. Sounds like an average day in Kapuskasing. |
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jutta, noted. But United is tanking, and the extra revenue from "Goose Saving Organizations" just might be their ticket, hahaha, out. |
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I figured each extra unexpected flight north would help. |
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(And yes I call it a "near accident", when it didn't end up in a full fuel flight flattening forty square miles of New York. It's all in your perspective, I reckon ;-) ) |
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//a full fuel flight flattening forty square miles of New York// |
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As blissmiss points out, that's what this one *didn't* do (that is, crash into an office building, similar to what happened during the 9/11 attacks.) |
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a miracle on one of your great streets... |
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That would be cubic miles, then? |
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Ask the good folk of Lockerbie. |
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